The Voyage of the Canon Keepers
by King Caspian the Seafarer
Summary: When movie-Susan shows up aboard the bookverse Dawn Treader, the Narnia Canon Keepers have it all under control...until the two keepers sent get stuck in the story and have to deal with a lovesick Susan, Eustace who thinks they're Nazis , and much more.
1. Prologue

_Prologue_

Silence.

Purple boughs swayed overhead. Dim, pleasant scents that reminded one of a pale spring day floated by on the soft breeze. Cobwebs glistened with early-morning dew, and frothy clouds wandered aimlessly above.

A king stood within a structure of wood and stone. He was a young king, with hair of gold and eyes as clear as the summer sky, though they could turn as dangerous as the sea if need be.

His name was Caspian, and he was dreaming.

The structure built around him was ancient; a solitary, quiet place that he had dreamt of before. It stood on four pillars of wood, in which were carved intricate runes and designs that seemed even more ancient than the land on which it was built. Ivy climbed the pillars, trailing round and round until it was near impossible to distinguish the living from dead.

Past the ancient structure was a beach, upon which lapped wave upon wave of crystalline water, clear as glass. A flicker of movement upon the beach caught Caspian's eye, and he craned his head slightly in order to see better. What he saw made his breath catch in his throat.

A tall girl stood with her back toward him, staring out to sea. Long pale locks of her thick hair tossed in the wind, mingling with the sky itself, and the mist that rose up from the sea. He uttered a cry, and she began turning, so slowly that he knew he must be dreaming.

But before he saw her face, before the moment of knowing, of recognition, there came a scream from the waking world, and the dream shattered as he jerked awake, lunging toward the door even before he knew quite that he was awake.

It was the moment where the Canon was broken, and the beginning of the adventure.


	2. In Which a Problem is Found

**The Voyage of the Canon Keepers**

_From the files of the NCK_.

ATTENTION: This report was formerly top secret, classified information that has been released into my care to publish in the form of fanfiction. It is meant to serve as a general warning for those of you who continue to break the Ordinances of Canon by** 1) Writing characters out of character (OOC) or making them into Mary Sue's/Gary Stu's 2) Putting characters where they do not belong and going against the Deep Magic and Aslan's command by doing so 3) Mixing movie-verse and book-verse and 4) Creating a romance between characters contrary to what is set in the Canon. **

Although these ordinances may be broken by labeling the story 'AU' or by receiving a permit from the NCK, it is not recommended. Cases where these ordinances and others are broken are dealt with by the NCK and may result in fines for the offenders or in the offender being cut off from the high circles of Narnian Fanfiction Writers and Readers.

However, although this case is meant to serve as a warning to offenders against the Canon, it is also for the enjoyment and amusement of Keepers of the Canon who grow weary of the offenders and their fics. Therefore, without further chitchat, the NCK (by way of a fanciful re-assessing and rearranging of the facts by this author) presents **the Voyage of the Canon Keepers**.

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**Dedicated to 'Donovan', who dreamed it up.**

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_Chapter 1: In Which a Problem is Discovered and A Solution is Sent_

It was your typical average, humdrum, ordinary day at the Narnia Canon Keepers control center. Three Mary Sues, one Gary, and a few false alarms from stories that hit the edge of Canon, but nothing serious that a quick typist or a keeper with a STARDD (Synchronized Time And Relative Dimension Device) couldn't manage. As a matter of fact, it was almost too average. Too humdrum. Alas that such things cannot be.

At approximately eleven-hundred hours, the alarm went off.

The watcher on watch glanced over at the flashing light with an annoyed-raised-eyebrow-look that she had been practicing for hours in the hopes that she might get to use it, and then let out a sigh.

"Bother. We've got a Canon-break aboard the Dawn Treader."

A figure who had been lounging around all morning, leaning against the wall and flipping through a copy of PWD (Past Watchful Dragons) straightened suddenly and gave the watcher a look.

"Book-verse?"

The watcher used her annoyed-raised-eyebrow-look for the second time successfully, and the lounger shrugged apologetically.

"Well you never know. Someone might have _tried _movie-verse."

The watcher gave him a glare and shook her head, tapping a few keys on her computer as she replied.

"Not if it's not even out yet."

The lounger let out a snicker, but then walked across the room to stand behind the watcher and watch her work.

"Dawn Treader, you said?" he asked after a moment of watching her key in the pass-codes needed to view the details of the alarm. "Haven't had one of those in a while."

"No we haven't, sir," she replied. "Not since the incident with Susan being reincarnated as Ramandu's Daughter. Boy was _that _one a mess. Author couldn't even get her plot straight."

The captain—for the lounger was a captain—shook his head and sighed.

"Oh yes. I _do _remember that one."

A dialogue box popped up on the screen, and the watcher groaned and put her head in her hands.

"What is it?" asked a new voice from the doorway. A girl stood there. Her shoulder-length red hair was tied back in French-braids, and there was a gleam of excitement in her eyes.

"Sue alert on the Dawn Treader," the captain said with a grin. "A 'Sue' in name and title."

"You mean…"

The captain nodded.

"Yes. A Canon character who's been 'sue'd; changed; OOC. Not only has she been sue'd, but she'd not even supposed to be aboard the DT at all!"

The girl paled. The watcher looked up and nodded at the silent question in her eyes.

"Yup. We've got a sue'd Susan on our hands. She's movie-verse—that means she's Caspian-crazy—and she's somehow got into VDT. I'd better send out an alert…this is going to be an important case."

"Wait!" the girl shouted from the doorway as the watcher moved to key in the codes. "Maybe I can take this one."

"You?" the captain asked, giving her a skeptical look. "Aren't you still working on that Caspian/OC that was giving us so much trouble?"

The girl shrugged.

"The situation's under control. Besides, that's movie-verse. What do I care for movie-verse Caspian—," she paused at the annoyed-raised-eyebrow-looks that she was getting, and added, "sir."

The man raised his eyebrows again and grinned.

"Blond Caspian fan, eh? It's just as well. All right, Donovan. The case is yours. Who for the other?"

"The other?"

The captain nodded. "Of course. When dealing with a Sue—or anyone who's where they shouldn't be for reasons unknown—always travel in pairs. Besides, you're just a second level, aren't you?"

"But I am a Narniac," Donovan protested.

Just as the captain had opened his mouth to reply, another voice joined their conversation.

"How 'bout me?"

Just behind Donovan, juggling a hot cup of coffee from hand to hand and watching with a pair of very mischievous eyes stood a young man with a tousled mop of straw-colored hair.

"Hullo, Connor," said the captain, raising an eyebrow. "If that coffee's for me, I hope for your sake there's no Tabasco sauce in it."

"Tabasco sauce?" asked the newcomer, innocence dripping from his voice as well as the almost-hurt look in his wide gray eyes. "Now if that isn't just the sort of thing you'd expect from a commanding officer…"

"It's not just him, Connor," snapped the watcher suddenly. "I still owe you one for the superglue on my chair."

"And then there was that message sent out—Priority 1, I seem to recall," the captain continued, keeping on even when Connor opened his mouth to protest, "that warned all Canon Keepers about the Lasaraleen/Puddleglum on with a link that led to a site advertising Reepicheep plush toys in green, purple, and burnt orange."

There was a moment of silence before Connor sniffed and said, "It was cherry red. Not burnt orange. And the evidence was all circumstantial." He glanced up, saw the looks the others were giving him, and held up his hands (thereby spilling the coffee on the front of his standard issue jacket). "Really!"

The others all stared as he jumped and yelped at the burning of hot coffee, spilled more by jumping, and then thrust the cup down (_Thankfully upright_, the watcher thought with a thankful sigh) on a console before he could do something worse with it.

"All right, I admit to the superglue and the Tabasco sauce—but I only play pranks when I'm bored. And you _do_ need someone else for this mission, don't you?"

"I thought you were still recovering from that nasty bit of business with Peter/Jill," said the captain, eyeing him doubtfully. "Therapy, and all."

Connor shrugged (though he might have been trying to suppress a shudder). "I'm over it. And I could use a good book-verse setting right about now. I've been stuck with movie-verse for a whole month. Boring schmoring."

The three others winced and eyed him with compassion (though the captain and watcher exchanged a sneaky grin in the middle of the compassionate glance).

"All right, then," quoth the captain with a sudden grin at the two keepers. "Report to the outfitting room for your devices and briefing. It shouldn't be too difficult to arrive, spray a little mind-wiping spray in the air, and then return with the Sue. But still," his expression grew somewhat mysterious and somewhat mischievous in nature, "you never know what kind of adventure it might turn out to be."

0o0o0o0o0o0o

Donovan and Connor ran down the hall towards the outfitting room, adrenalin pumping through their veins. Donovan glanced at the young man and grinned.

"It's good to see you again, Connor. We haven't had a chance to work with each other since that awful movie-verse with Peter/OC, back when we were first-levels." Donovan said, her words tinted with the Manchester accent she had adopted.

Connor smiled. "Yeah. I remember. Caspian's twin. Ugh." He shuddered, and then gave her a sideways look. "It sounds like you've got that accent down perfectly now. You were only beginning to develop it back then. But," he paused to think, "I guess I saw you at the NCK dinner last month, when Hoops gave us that talk, and you had it then. Been practicing, have you?"

"You bet I 'ave." Donovan grinned as they skirted a pair of Canon-Keepers that were dragging a struggling movie-verse Caspian.

"I do no know what you're talking about!" the Caspian cried out. "I love Susan."

"Er, no. You don't," Connor said as he ran past him. Donovan laughed, and they arrived in the outfitting room.

"Righ', let's get goin'." Donovan said, grabbing a STARDD and tossing it at Connor. He yelped in surprise, but caught it (albeit after fumbling with it for about three seconds).

The young man behind the control panel gave them a jealous look.

"Off to book-verse, are you? Luckies."

Donovan grinned as she clipped the device onto her belt (also grabbing a stun gun and mind-wiping spray) and nodded eagerly.

"Yup. Susan's up to no good. Plug in the coordinates like a good lad, and maybe we'll tell you about it when we get back."

He glared, but not angrily. It was all in fun, of course. He'd had his trip to book-verse the previous week, but his STARDD had gone haywire, forcing him to return before he'd have liked.

"A word of warning before you go," he said, suddenly remembering the incident. "The STARDD's have been acting up lately...not completely reliable anymore. We're getting in new equipment this week, the new model called STARDID's, but until then, well...just be careful. Good luck."

"I have now lived a hundredandnine winters in this world and have never yet met any such thing as Luck," Connor replied sagely.

Donovan and the youth at the console both glared at him. He shrugged and offered a sheepish grin.

"What? We're Keepers. We're supposed to know them by heart, right? Right?"

Donovan groaned. The operator gave her a pitying look and shook his head.

"You're going to need some luck with _him _along. As for you, Connor, you're lucky I didn't tell the captain about the koolade in the shower hea—"

"All right, mate, we can talk when I get back," Connor interrupted nervously. "Charge 'er up."

The two Keepers exchanged a slightly nervous, slightly excited look, and then grinned.

"Can I say it?" Connor whispered pleadingly. Donovan rolled her eyes, but nodded. Connor assumed a dramatic stance and said, in his best Captain Kirk voice:

"Energize."

And with a flash of blue light they disappeared from that world to reappear in another.

**_To Be Continued..._**

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**AN:** I must confess that I'm doing a rather bold thing by beginning to post chapters of a fic I have not finished yet. Finished story-izing for the NCK, that is. Because the Voyage of the Canon Keepers is still in an unfinished format, we, the author, must crave your indulgence and pardon for irregular updates. We shall endeavor to post with consistency, but if we fail...well, you'd better write some really encouraging reviews.

I would have waited to release this to the public until it was completed but for the fact that the NCK wanted it out before the Voyage of the Dawn Treader actually comes out. Perhaps it will help to slow the barrage of bad fics that are sure to come after December 10th.

**Also. This fic is co-written, the authors being myself (King Caspian the Seafarer, or KC, rather) and ReginaRose, who finally joined . :) Look her up. She writes about Newsies.**


	3. In Which Our Heroes Get Wet

**A/N: Just to mention something I forgot to say at the beginning (which I really should have because it's quite important) is that I'm actually co-writing this fic with a friend. She doesn't have an account and so shall remain anonymous, but you can call her Donovan, if you like. ;)**

**Enjoy.  
**

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_Chapter 2: In Which Our Heroes Get Wet_

SPLASH!

"You 'ave got to be kiddin' me!" Donovan cried as she floundered in the water.

"This is it?" Connor sputtered, automatically beginning to tread and wishing violently that he had put on tennis shoes that morning instead of NCK standard issue boots. "This is the Dawn Treader?"

A shadow fell on them from the left and the Keepers looked up at the hulking mass of ship that towered over them.

"Erm, no," Donovan replied sarcastically. "I think _that's_ the Dawn Treader."

They stared up at the green sides of the hull in awe, but then Connor snapped his fingers (something rather difficult to do when you're treading water) and let out a shout.

"The coordinates! They must've been off, slightly!"

Donovan growled and began to rant softly, under her breath, about what they were going to do to the controller when they got back. "That control room has got to be renovated. There's nothing in there except for a jumble of wires that no one can do anything with! Urgh!" She splashed about angrily. Her fiery temper was getting the best of her. She kicked off her red trainers regretfully. They were (had been, rather) her favorites—blast the faulty coordinates!

"At least we've arrived the same way as them," Connor said, pointing over to several figures floundering in the water nearby.

A dark-haired boy and a girl with hair that would've been yellow had it not been so dreadfully wet were treading water on either side of a younger boy with brownish hair; they were both trying desperately to stay afloat while the smaller boy tried his best to keep them from doing that. Edmund, Lucy, and Eustace, apparently. Susan was nowhere to be seen.

"Where's the blasted Sue got to?" Donovan sputtered. "If we could just get her now, before anyone's seen her..."

"'ey!" Connor shouted suddenly. "ED! Where's Susan?"

The dark-haired boy's head jerked toward them with a startled look on his face (apparently their guess had been correct: he seemed to answer to the name 'Edmund'). He was in the middle of subduing the other boy (who was, indeed, Eustace), and it took a moment for him to answer.

"I don't know! She's one of the best swimmers at school, though!"

"Of course she is," Donovan muttered. "Typical Sue."

"No, it's bookverse," Connor responded, eyes scanning the greenish depths surrounding them for any sign of the Other Pevensie. "Remember, from PC, when they're on the island?"

A splash, not too far to Donovan's right, signaled Caspian's descent into the water. Both the Canon Keepers sent a silent prayer to Aslan that they would find Susan before he did. As if in answer, a hand shot out from the water a few feet away from the Pevensies. Connor gave a growl.

"There she is. You go help their Majesties with Scrubb, and I'll tend to her."

Donovan was about to reply that maybe she should be the one to go after Susan, but Connor dove beneath the surface before the words were out, so she merely rolled her eyes and turned to help Edmund and Lucy with Eustace. The angry ten year old was giving Edmund a hard time as he struggled in the water. His hands were clutched around Edmund's neck and he kept dragging the oldest Pevensie boy present down into the water.

"Scrubb!" Donovan shouted, reaching toward him. "Scrubb, calm down!"

"I can't swim!" he gasped when he came up for air. Ed's face was turning a bluish color as Eustace's hands tightened.

Suddenly, a blond head bobbed up just a foot or so away. Donovan half-froze in surprise—it was Caspian, that was clear enough, but he looked the devil like…

"AACCKKK!" Edmund gasped, slapping at Eustace as best he could while being choked. Caspian grabbed one arm and Donovan grabbed the other. Together they pried the boy's grip free.

"Sorry, your Majesty," Donovan apologized, speaking to Edmund, who was now choking in air like a fish who's just been returned to the water. "Wish we'd gotten here sooner. Ahoy, the ship!"

A line was cast down. Caspian grabbed it and gave Donovan a questioning look.

"Have you got him?" 'Him' was Eustace. Donovan nodded, and the boy-king paddled toward Lucy and Edmund. The line was quickly secured around Lucy, and Caspian shouted up for the men to pull her aboard. They did so, rather too slowly for Donovan's taste, but eventually got her over the side.

"Who are you, anyway?" asked Caspian as they fastened the line this time to Eustace. "If you'll forgive my terrible timing in asking…"

Donovan fished for the mindwiping spray that was stuck to her belt, and then gave it up, figuring it could wait until they were all on board with the Sue in hand.

"I'm a Cano…er, a friend of Narnia, Sire."

Thinking of the Sue made her remember Susan…and Connor. She turned halfway in the water—Eustace was overhead, dripping and blubbing far harder than any child his age had any right to—and saw a flash of movement on the other side of a wave.

"Connor?" she shouted.

"Connor?" Edmund asked, panting even though he'd almost caught his breath. "Do you think he found Susan?"

"Susan?" asked Caspian suddenly. Donovan and Edmund turned back and saw his brow furrowing in confusion. "Queen Susan is _here_? But I thought…"

The line splashed back down in the water between them, and all three looked at it in surprise.

"Ladies first," Edmund said politely, grabbing it and holding it out toward Donovan.

She was so tired she might have accepted save for the fact that one Canon Keeper in the water with Susan and Caspian was the makings of a disaster.

"No, you go," she said with a weary smile. "I'll find your sister."

He flashed her a stubborn look and dove under the waves—away from the line, blast it all. Muttering under her breath about kings and boys in general, Donovan held her breath and followed.

They found Connor and Susan a few waves away. Connor had Susan by the wrists, and was struggling to keep both of them afloat. Susan didn't look too worried—she was crooning about Caspian and 'twu wuve'. With a grimace, Donovan grabbed one of the girl's arms and began towing her back toward the ship.

"Had a little trouble, did you?" she asked, eying the red marks of what looked like lipstick on Connor's cheek.

He reddened and swiped at it frantically. "She thought I was _him_. Next time she's your responsibility."

"I should've gone after her _this_ time," Donovan retorted with a quick glare. "She could've used her Sue charm on you—they do that, you know."

"Even in the water? With her mascara running?"

"You never know."

They reached the line. Caspian was treading water and looking rather puzzled and somewhat curious at the beautiful black-haired young woman who was being dragged to the side of the ship. Susan saw him and let out a shriek, but just in time, Donovan dove for Caspian and shoved him underwater before either could do any harm. Meanwhile, Connor and Edmund tied the rope around the resisting Susan. She rose from the water just as Caspian and Donovan surfaced.

"What was that for?" Caspian choked, spitting up sea water.

"Sorry, Sire. Absolutely urgent. It would've been…unpleasant if I hadn't."

"Are you Connor?" asked Edmund. Connor nodded.

"You're Edmund Pevensie, I suppose. Not much of a place for introductions—or first impressions, either. Thanks for the help with that…with, um…"

The line splashed down into the water. Apparently the crew was getting the hang of towing people on board. The four stared at it, then Edmund put on his stubborn look again.

"I'm not going up until she does."

Connor hesitated, and then nodded.

"Do as he says, Donovan. Someone needs to be up there with the…I mean, with you-know-who, at all times."

Grumbling about the idiocy of males again, Donovan (quite stubbornly) tied the line about herself without any help from the others, and felt the ropes tighten as the crew of the Dawn Treader heaved her aboard.

When she reached the top, Donovan grabbed the hand of the sailor reaching out to her and was pulled over the railing and onto the deck. The man looked strangely at what must have seemed to him the utterly strange garments that she was wearing, but he said nothing as she moved to stand next to the other shivering youths who were standing a little ways away from the rail.

At least, two of them were. Lucy was standing by the railing and staring down at the three who were still in the water. Susan and Eustace were standing near the mast. Eustace was crying. Susan was fixing her hair.

With a sigh, Donovan unhooked the stun-gun from her belt and marched over to Susan. Might as well get the job done and head back before things got any further off track. She switched the gun onto its lowest setting and fired discreetly at the preening Pevensie.

Nothing happened. With a frown, Donovan turned the gun up to full power, aimed carefully, and fired again. There came a sound from the standard issue NCK stun gun similar to that of an underwater explosion—a sort of 'blorp'. A few tendrils of smoke came from the muzzle of the weapon, but nothing else.

_Lion's mane,_ Donovan thought (keeping the readers of the report in mind as she chose her expletive). She flipped the gun over and read on the bottom 'made in China'. Underneath that was the condemning phrase 'not to be immersed in water'.

She was still staring at the waterlogged weapon when a sharp, whining voice bawled,

"What is that?"

It was only when Donovan saw Eustace Scrubb staring at the gun in her hands that she realized that he had stopped crying. With a yelp, Donovan shoved the stun-gun into her belt and turned away from him.

"It's nothin'."

There was a sound like a shout from down in the water. Donovan joined Lucy by the edge and _really _began wishing her stun-gun was operational. Not far from the three young men who were bobbing up and down in the waves (actually just two, as Edmund was in the process of being hauled aboard the ship) was a pale, jagged dorsal fin sticking out of the water. No. Correct that…there were two…no, three dorsal fins, all wagging back and forth like flimsy pieces of plastic in the wind.

"Sharks?" Donovan gulped.

Lucy nodded, and they exchanged a troubled look. Sharks.

"I hope they get aboard before…before…" Lucy hesitated, and then added, "We only had trouble with sharks once when we were here before.

"Edmund was the one in the water, then, too," she added so softly that Donovan had to strain to hear.

That statement made Donovan wonder: had there been sharks mentioned in the book _at all_?

"It's a gun, isn't it?"

"No," Donovan replied sharply, not even deigning to shoot Eustace a glare. "Just…'ang on a minute, all righ'?"

She watched as Connor drew his stun-gun and aimed, but before she could shout a warning it 'blorped' like hers had and let out a puff of smoke. Connor looked up in surprise at Donovan, who gave him a doleful nod. Stun-guns were not going to be useful on this mission.

"It's not a British gun—or an American one either. Harold doesn't like me to read books about guns, but I found plenty at my school's library."

"Scrubb," Donovan said dangerously.

"Oh! I say!" there was a shocked, flushed look to Eustace's face. "It's German, isn't it? You're a spy!"

Donovan turned away in disgust.

Fortunately the sharks did not approach Caspian and Connor. After Edmund was safely on board, they tossed the line back down and after about ten seconds' delay, Caspian began ascending the ship's side.

"If you're a German spy, then are you the one who made the picture explode?" Eustace continued doggedly. "Have the Germans invented time-and-space-travel devices? Harold doesn't believe in them. And what are you wearing? Is it a wetsuit? Were you in a submarine? Are we somewhere off the coast of England—or are we near Germany?"

"Scrubb," said Donovan, turning and giving him the evil eye. "Does this sound like a German accent to you?"

That gave him something to think about, but only for a second.

"You're a double agent!"

Donovan felt a sudden urge to bang her head up against the masthead. This was the first time she'd had the urge in a long while. It would not be the last.

To keep from doing anything drastic or violent, she turned back to look over the side. Caspian was nearing the railing, and it seemed that Connor was beginning to tire in the water. The biggest shark kept inching a foot nearer to the soggy Canon Keeper each time he made a pass. Connor was watching it with a wild, but cool expression (if there be such a thing). At last the line was thrown back down and his calm demeanor vanished as he frantically began tying it around his waist.

The young man Donovan took to be Caspian approached from the railing, dripping and rubbing his arms.

"Your friend is stubborn," he said with a smile. "He insisted upon my coming up first."

"Of course 'e did," Donovan muttered to herself, shivering and staring down at said friend, who was still fiddling with the rope. "Probably gave you the whole Canon Keeper's Oath as a reason, too."

"_Cannon_ Keeper?" Eustace exclaimed. "As in the anti-aircraft kind, or antiques? Or are the Germans inventing something new…a new kind of cannon?"

The young king gave Eustace a curious look. Donovan ignored him. Lucy turned and gave them all a puzzled glance, but then turned back to say something to Edmund, who had joined them at the railing.

"Great Scott!" Donovan heard Edmund mutter. "D'you think he'll make it?"

They were staring over the edge, toward the water, and despite the worried churning in her stomach, Donovan looked down again as well.

"'e's only _just _finished tying the ropes?" she cried in astonishment, and then muttered, "Fool of a Took. If 'e's doing this just so 'e can have a good story to tell when we get back about 'ow 'e fought off sharks and saved everybody's lives, then I'll…"

She stopped because the biggest shark suddenly decided to risk injury for the taste of human flesh. This time when it turned to make another pass it did not veer off to the right or left but kept on until the shark and the Canon Keeper were practically nose to nose. The crew had begun hoisting Connor upward, but there was a moment in which everything was frozen, as the crew stared at Connor and Connor stared at the shark and the shark stared at Connor's legs.

"'it its nose!" Donovan screamed.

* * *

_**TBC...**_


	4. In Which Introductions are Made

_Chapter 3: In Which Introductions Are Made_

"'it its nose!" Donovan screamed.

And Connor did, because every self-respecting Canon Keeper knows that when one is facing a hungry shark, the best thing to do is to hit it on the nose. Of course. Others might speculate that Connor was merely following orders, however I (*ahem*) suspect he had complete control of the situation and was just about to strike the foul fish when Donovan cried out.

We could argue for weeks and never settle on an answer, but the result was the same: Connor struck the shark a sharp, surprising blow on the nose. It hung there for a moment, in shock, and then ducked away under a wave to recover. By the time it returned to the spot where it had almost attacked our noble Canon Keeper, said Keeper was no longer there.

A cheer was raised as soon as he was hoisted over the edge. The first thing Connor did when he reached Donovan was sneeze.

"Gesundheit," Donovan said sympathetically.

"GERMAN!" Eustace screeched.

"Oh, Eustace, don't be such an idiot," Edmund said, quietly taking his cousin by the arm and pulling him a little ways away from the others.

"Well, that was a close one," Donovan said, watching as Connor began rubbing his arms and inspecting his fingers, as if to be sure they were all still there.

"Yes, it was rather nerve-wracking, I must say," he replied calmly, though later he would hold to a much different account of that day (**NCK Record [Quote: Connor, Ioan]:** "Frightened?" he asked with a casual grin. "Frightened of a little thing like a shark?" **[End Quote]**). "I take it your stun-gun is in the same condition as mine?"

Donovan nodded.

"Apparently they were serious about the dangers of submerging them in water."

To his credit, Connor hardly looked sheepish. "Ah," he said, closing his eyes for a long moment. "Yes. That would probably be the reason for their malfunction."

There was a moment of silence. And then, at approximately the same instant that a scream tore the air in two, both Canon Keepers remembered Susan.

"CASPIAN!1111"

Connor and Donovan turned almost as one and winced as the eldest Pevensie present threw her arms around the dripping blond, who let out a confused yelp.

"Bug," Connor gulped, thanking his stars their captain wasn't here. "Now we're in for it."

Fortunately Donovan had the presence of mind to act right off and strode forward, laying her hands on the Sue and pulling her sticky arms away from Caspian. Unfortunately, Susan had managed to land a kiss or so, and Caspian, like Connor, was hastily rubbing away red smears from his cheeks and lips.

"Queen Susan?" he asked, edging backward slightly as Susan tried to lunge for him again, despite Donovan's hold on her arms. "Are you quite well?"

Connor moved to help his fellow Canon Keeper but Edmund intercepted him before he made it there.

"Who exactly do you think you are?" he asked, a flash of anger in his eyes. "This is my sister, and you have no right to lay hands on her and—"

Connor whipped out his ESB (Emergency Spray Bottle…though he had carried his favorite Star Wars movie with him on occasion, come to think of it), switched the setting to "De-OOC-ifyinger and hit Edmund full in the face with a blast of it. The young Pevensie blinked, grew noticeably less Skandar Keynes-ish and a little bit shorter, and looked around in surprise.

"Great Scott! What's Susan doing here?"

_That's more like it_, though Connor, pumping his fist once in victory. _Take that, movieverse fanatics._

He cut his rejoicing short when Donovan let out a frustrated cry (Susan had just kicked her in the shins) and hastened to spray the De-OOC-ifier on the sue'd Su as well. He hadn't hoped for much of a result…after all, she was out of place in the Canon as well as being half Mary Sue at this point…but to his surprise, Susan froze, looked down at her dripping raiment, and went pale.

"OM," she said, breathing quick and fast. "OMW. Im liek, SOOKED!"

Connor's surprise faded, and he thought to himself, _Oh well. At least she's not after Caspian anymore._

But now Caspian was staring at her with wide, curious eyes, wetting his lips and beginning to realize what was happening, exactly.

"Susan," he said quietly, staring into her eyes. "Truly, you have grown…different since we last met. Were not your eyes blue then, rather than the color of fresh lettuce and the sparkling sea when it gleams green in the early morning sun? Did you not have lips of a lighter hue, and skin with less of a pearly, alabaster—"

Connor quickly hit him with a dose of the De-OOC-ifier as well, and the young king blinked and began looking confused again. Donovan sighed in relief, and after Connor had surveyed the rest of the deck and ascertained that there was no one else who was tremendously out of character, he returned his ESB to his belt and gave it a grateful pat.

"Caspian!" said Lucy suddenly from beside the railing where she'd been trying to comfort Eustace (and keep him from shouting horrible things at the top of his lungs). "I say, Edmund, have we got back into Narnia?"

"By Gum!" Edmund yelped, a grin flashing across his face. "I didn't think anything of it in the water, but it is!"

Donovan and Connor both felt a shiver of amazement as they watched the two ancient sovereigns greet the current one as they had in the book, "shaking hands and clapping one another on the backs with great delight".

"But who are your friends?" King Caspian asked when they were through, turning to look at Eustace, Susan, Donovan, and Connor. "This girl resembles your sister, I think, but I cannot say that she is the Queen Susan I remember."

"Nor is she, sire," Donovan said quickly. "She is rather a changed version of the Susan you knew before."

"And you?" Caspian asked, raising an eyebrow as he took in Donovan and Connor's strange garb (brown t-shirts, khaki standard issue jackets, and black-ish gray trousers that had a tendency to shrink over time). "You are from England as well?"

"They're double agents who work for the Nazi's!" Eustace exclaimed, stopping his crying to point accusingly in their direction. "They're the ones who bombed Cambridge and have sent us into this delusional realm. It's a hallucination—or else they've got some sort of superior technology, but I'm NOT GOING TO COOPERATE!"

Connor had a sudden coughing fit, Donovan rolled her eyes and slapped his shoulder threateningly, and Caspian continued looking confused.

"And this…" he continued, turning to look at Eustace, who was crying again, quite steadily. "…this is…?"

"Er…" Edmund blushed and ran a hand through his hair before exchanging a look with Lucy. "It's Eustace, I'm afraid."

"Eustace," Caspian said, turning to Eustace with his cheerful smile. "It is a pleasure to have you—"

"Oh, just STOP IT!" Eustace screeched, sobbing and rubbing his arms as if he was freezing to death (despite the glorious warmth from the sun and cool breeze off the sea). "Let me go. Let me go BACK! I don't _like_ it!"

"Let you go?" said Caspian. "But where?"

"Back…back…" Eustace pointed over the side of the ship, as if he expected to see the picture frame, and perhaps Lucy's bedroom in his home beyond, but there was nothing save the pale blue of the sky and the playful, foam-flecked waves that tossed their hair in the breeze, "…back there."

He was promptly sick. Caspian and Lucy watched him with pity, Edmund with compassionate loathing, and the two Canon Keepers with straight faces despite the glee that was hiding just underneath. Connor's glee was perhaps a little less than it might have been had they been on land, for all ready his stomach was beginning to disagree with the motion of the ship. He swallowed, however, and tried to ignore it.

"Hey, Rynelf!" said Caspian to one of the sailors. "Bring spiced wine for their Majesties." Turning to Lucy, Susan, and Edmund, he added, "You'll need something to warm you after that dip."

Spiced wine! Donovan shivered in delight at the thought of actually tasting the stuff. Would it be like tea, or wassail, or Starbucks? Or perhaps something entirely different. Caspian was still talking animatedly to Lucy and Edmund (Susan was still working on her hair) when Rynelf returned with a flagon of the steaming spiced wine, as well as (Donovan counted them in dismay) _seven_ silver cups! Three extra than there had been in the book.

_Blast, _she thought, taking a deep breath. _A minor detail in the canon and we couldn't even keep it as it should be._

And then she happened to look over at Susan, who, after sputtering at the first sip and looking around to make sure no one had seen, had downed the entire cupful.

"Why, Queen Susan," Caspian said, staring in surprise as she handed her goblet back to Rynelf for a refill, "I did not know you were accustomed to drinking so…heavily."

"That's what you've done to me, you Telmarine," Susan replied, turning angsty instead of gleeful. Caspian winced at the word 'Telmarine', because in bookverse he considered himself quite Narnian, and had since the beginning of the ordeal with Miraz. "I never used to drink before, but all those weeks in England, with that awful gray sky and no one to hold me and tell me I was theirs forever…"

Connor calmly doused her and Caspian with de-OOC-ifying spray, and she stopped abruptly in the middle of the sentence.

It twisted Donovan's stomach to think of all the breaks in the canons that were still to come, and then, suddenly, her stomach was reeling and spinning and she felt quite definitely sick.

"What's the matter, Donovan?" Connor asked her with a grin, noticing the greenish hue her face had taken. "Is it Susan that sickens you, or the sea?"

Donovan was preparing to join Eustace at the ship's railing when a nice-looking man with a reddish beard shoved a cup of something that smelled like cinnamon into her hands and she drank without a second thought.

It was strong, the spiced wine. Warm and tasting of a thousand wonderful things all spun together, it made her forget completely about her stomach—until she lost it over the edge of the ship a few seconds later.

"Don't worry," said Lucy's voice at her elbow. "You'll feel better in a minute or so. Drink some of this."

Donovan looked down at the cup of wine and gagged.

"I tried. Doesn't help."

Her stomach heaved again, and she moaned in agony. Perhaps she shouldn't have been so callous about poor Eustace's misfortunes. Behind her, she could hear Connor snickering. Some friend he was turning out to be.

"Just take a tiny sip," Lucy said; there was a hint of command in her voice. "A little bit at a time. And don't look down at the waves—look up at the horizon."

Donovan followed her instructions, and the wave of sickness passed as the warm liquid washed the nasty taste of bile from her mouth. She swallowed, and then gave Queen Lucy a shaky smile.

"Thanks."

The youngest Pevensie gave her a quick nod, and then moved on to Eustace, who was still bent over the railing, sobbing frantically. As soon as he had taken a sip of the spiced wine, though, he spit it out, began making the most horrible faces, was sick again over the side, and, sobbing, asked for Plumptree's Vitaminized Nerve Food.

"And you'd better make it with distilled water," he finished, between sobs. "Alberta never uses the other. And I insist on being put ashore at the next station—wherever that is."

Meanwhile, Donovan found Connor and fixed him with a glare.

"I thought Canon Keepers were supposed to stick together," she said in response to the innocent look he gave her.

"Well, yes," Connor admitted, looking a little sheepish, "But it's awfully ironic—being sick on the Dawn Treader, of all places. You would be the one, wouldn't you, Donovan?"

He poked her playfully, and she gave him another glower. In the silence that followed, they heard Caspian say, "This is a merry shipmate you've brought us, Brother."

Donovan looked over at Eustace, who was now throwing an all-out tantrum, and sighed deeply.

"And you don't even know the 'alf of it."

o0o0o0o0o

Once Eustace had been attended to, Caspian turned once more to the two Canon Keepers.

"I don't believe we've been formally introduced. I am King Caspian of Narnia."

"Which one? The Seafarer?" Connor quipped, deadpan. "Oh, wait you haven't…um, never mind."

As Caspian was beginning to look rather confused again, Donovan rolled her eyes and dealt Connor a head slap.

"Ignore him, your Majesty. We all do." Then she paused, wondering if it would be better to curtsy, bow, or hold out her hand, and added, "I'm Donovan."

"Donovan?" asked Lucy, who was watching with some curiosity. "That's not a girl's name."

She gave Donovan a reproachful look, and the Canon Keeper grinned.

"True; I suppose I've just gotten used to it." She would've added something about the NCK but her concern for Caspian's sanity kept her quiet on that subject. "My Christian name is Cordelia."

"So _that's_ why you go by Donovan," Connor said, snickering again. Donovan silenced him with another glare.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Cordelia," Caspian said, relieving her anxieties by bowing and kissing her hand gallantly. "I assume you know Queen Lucy and King Edmund, Queen Susan, and their kinsman?"

"We know _of _them, Sire," Connor replied abruptly. "Though they don't know us."

Caspian turned to look at him, and then froze and stared in surprise.

"By the mane," he breathed. "By the Lion's mane."

Connor met his gaze, and then winced.

"Oh drat. This could mean trouble."

"S-sire," said the man named Rhince, who almost dropped the flagon of spiced wine in shock as he looked from Connor to Caspian and then back again. "Why he's…he's the very double…"

"Tis like looking into a mirror," Caspian said, holding out a hand which Connor shook firmly. "Who are you, friend? Are you from Narnia?"

"Not exactly," Connor said, fidgeting. "I'm from…well, _we're_ from the same world as the Pevensies. I never thought," he laughed nervously, and then continued, "I never dreamed that I'd…well, that you'd …that _we'd _look alike."

They did look alike. The Canon Keeper and the King were close enough in age and stature to be twins. After eyeing each other for another moment, Connor grinned.

"Are you certain you don't have a long lost brother?"

Caspian looked a little disconcerted, but Connor laughed before it could morph to confusion.

"I'm Connor, Sire. _Ioan_ Connor," he added, giving Lucy a pointedly pleased look, "but I prefer just Connor. I'm with Donovan. We've, uh, been sent by…Aslan to make certain you…well, um…"

"We're here to help," Donovan finished before Connor could say something about Sue's or Su's or the NCK. "In…well, whatever you're doing."

"Because there's no way we could know about your quest to the End of the World to find the Seven Lost Lords because you haven't even told us about it yet!" Connor added, all in one breath.

At the look Donovan was giving him, he sighed, "I know, I know," took out his spray bottle, and filled the air with mind-wiping spray. "I just wanted to say it."

"You would," Donovan replied disgustedly.

* * *

**_TBC..._**


	5. In Which Susan is a Bother

**A/N: So, it's been a while since I updated. I apologize. Not only have I had Writer's Block (again!) but I've been busy and very tired. I read when I should be writing and sleep when I should be doing anything else...but that's life for you. :) Happy October! I don't know how many of you have seen the new trailer (check it out on Narniaweb) but it's given me ideas for more Blond Caspian Rebellion fics. That totally bash movieverse. :)  
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**In the interest of continuing this story, I now present you with...  
**

* * *

_Chapter 4: In Which Susan is a Bother_

In the minutes that followed, Reepicheep appeared, causing Eustace to wail and Susan (who was afraid of mice) to faint and be revived. This phobia had not bothered her noticeably in her previous Narnian experiences, but now it was mostly to gain Caspian's attention and hopefully eventual love. Reepicheep looked suspiciously at Donovan and Connor, but as he was more concerned with a sputtering Eustace, they were left to watch the goings on in peace.

And then Lucy and Edmund both sneezed.

"What a fool I am to keep you all standing here in your wet things," said Caspian. "Come on below and get changed. I'm afraid you, Lucy, and Queen Susan and Cordelia—"

"Just Donovan, please," Donovan put in, ignoring Connor's snickering.

"Donovan, then," Caspian replied with a grin. "I'm afraid we have no women's clothes on board. You'll have to make do with some of mine, and what spares we can find from my men. Lead the way, Reepicheep, like a good fellow. Rhince, go ask about and see what clothes you can spare from the crew—preferably clean clothes, of course."

Rhince 'aye ayed' and left to do his job. The mouse glared ferociously at Eustace, muttering about honour and ladies, but he led them to the stern, to Caspian's cabin. Donovan followed Edmund and Lucy, grateful that there were no skirts aboard.

"No women's clothes aboard?" Susan moaned. "How can there be no women's clothes aboard? Caspian would have carried my clothes aboard. He would pine over my absence by…OH!"

Connor rolled his eyes as he put his spray bottle away.

"Thank Aslan for de-OOC-ifying spray," he said to Donovan, who smiled and ducked as she, Edmund, and Lucy followed Caspian, Reepicheep, and Eustace into Caspian's cabin.

But before she made it inside, Connor grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

"Wait a second." His brow was furrowed in thought.

Donovan struggled and gave him a look.

"Have you gone mad? Let me go."

"I don't get it," Connor continued, ignoring her furious plea. "Why are we going in for dry clothes? I mean, meeting everybody was nice and all, but aren't we supposed to get Susan out of here before more damage can be done to the Canon?"

Donovan let out a long sigh and shook her head.

"Connor, remember what happened to the stun-guns?"

Glancing down at his belt and fingering said weapon, Connor nodded.

"Yeeeeess…." He looked like he was going to ask another question, but something seemed to click within his brain and he gasped and grabbed at the bulky STARDD on his belt (Synchronized Time and Relative Dimension Device).

The STARDD was what allowed their travel to a certain time and place in Narnia and back again. It was a miniaturized model of the one the Professor had invented for the **CENSOR CENSOR CENSOR CENSOR** in the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe. So really, the STARDD was the most important piece of equipment on a mission, the only thing that could get them back home…

…and Connor's was soaking wet.

"Come on," he muttered, trying to power it up. Nothing happened. With a groan, Connor flung it to the ground and began slapping his forehead with his palm.

"We're doomed. We're absolutely doomed."

Donovan, who had found herself freed when Connor began searching for his STARDD, shook her head.

"Not doomed. Just…well, in a fix."

"In a fix?" Connor exclaimed, giving her a look. "Yeah, we somehow managed to sabotage both our stun-guns AND our STARDDs on the same mission. We are _so _getting demoted after this."

"Probably stuck in movie-verse for the next thirty years," Donovan commiserated. As this sunk in, she added, with a shiver, "You're right. We are doomed."

"What I want to know is why they didn't make any of this stuff waterproof!" said Connor, flipping over his STARDD and trying to read the small print that probably just said 'made in China' in fifteen different languages. "I mean, aboard the Dawn Treader, you'd have to be amazing to keep it perfectly dry."

"We're supposed to be the best of the best," Donovan quipped with a snicker.

Connor glared.

"You know what I mean."

They both stood in silence for a minute, trying to figure out what exactly had happened and what exactly was going to happen, when Reepicheep appeared in the doorway of Caspian's cabin.

"So you are here," the mouse said, watching them suspiciously. "The king feared you had decided to leave us."

"We're just coming, Sir Reepicheep," Donovan said; Reepicheep seemed satisfied when she addressed him with his rightful title, so he bowed graciously to her and returned.

"What do we do now?" Connor asked as they edged toward the doorway.

"I was hoping you'd have an idea," Donovan confessed. "I wonder if we'd be returned at the end of the adventure. If so, I wouldn't exactly mind staying."

But then they saw Susan, holding one of Caspian's shirts and staring at him with fervent, worshipful eyes, and began to think again. Susan and Lucy had been given outfits to wear already, but Edmund and Eustace were still waiting. Rhince pushed past them with an armload of tunics, and Caspian thanked him handsomely and found tunics for Edmund and the Pevensies' cousin. While they were waiting, Donovan looked around. The cabin was very tiny but bright with painted panels (all birds and beasts and crimson dragons and vines) and spotlessly clean.

"Here, Corde...Donovan." Caspian handed Donovan a light blue tunic with a golden sun that Donovan recognized from the Pauline Baynes illustrations, and leggings to go underneath. "I'm afraid we don't have any boots of the right size for you ladies."

"We can try and stuff the toes if they're too big." Donovan suggested. "I don't relish the idea of numerous splinters in my feet. I'm pretty sure Queen Lucy and Queen…er...Susan would like that at all."

"Point taken, my lady." Caspian said, holding up another shirt. "Here, Connor. I'm afraid this is a bit worn, but it looks the right size."

Connor took the shirt uncertainly. "Er...thanks, your Majesty."

"Let us leave the ladies to change and once we are all dry, sleeping arrangements can be seen to." Caspian suggested. "I only hope we have enough room."

"Your Majesty, Connor and I can sleep on deck." Donovan said quickly. "There's no reason for you to disrupt your entire ship on the account of more passengers than expected."

"Expected?" Caspian replied, looking at her quizzically. "What should we have expected? Who are we to know Aslan's plan, for is it not He who calls and sends away?"

Donovan and Connor stared at Caspian in surprise.

_By Gum, he thinks deep._ Donovan thought. She _said_, "As you wish, Your Majesty."

"We are at your service and disposal." Connor added, bowing his head. "Though we'd prefer you not dispose of us, really."

Caspian looked blank for a minute, but then grinned as he got the joke.

"No fear. We left the plank in the Seven Isles."

As the king turned to go, Edmund towing the moaning Eustace along behind him, Connor had his turn at looking blank, and then burst out laughing.

"The plank! They left the plank in the Seven Isles…Don, he has a sense of humor!"

Donovan looked up from wringing out her jacket and gave him an annoyed glower before the door shut behind him.

"Oh lovely. As if one Connor isn't quite enough."

Susan stood staring after Caspian with a dazzled gaze. She kept twirling a lock of her damp hair around one finger, probably trying to curl it. Donovan tossed a boot at her (gently) and said, "Change, your highness. Before you catch cold."

Susan turned and gave her an indignant stare.

"What do you think I am, a complete idiot?"

For a moment Donovan caught a glimpse of _Queen _Susan in those greenish-blue eyes, a look of scorn that must've frozen the blood of dozens of suitors…but then again, this was movie-Susan.

"You _were_ staring at Caspian like one," Lucy muttered as she peeled off her wet clothing. "I don't know why you're turning into such a flirt. You didn't care tuppence about him last time we were here."

"You're just jealous because he hardly looked at you," Susan snapped, pulling a tunic over her head so that her voice sounded muffled for a moment.

Lucy met Donovan's gaze, and the two felt a curious thrill of understanding. Donovan smiled and wondered what it was like to have an older sister like movie-verse Susan. Once they were dry, Donovan dragged out a pair of Caspian's boots and tried them on.

"Caspian was right," she said, clomping two steps in them and giving up. "They're hopelessly big. And heavy."

"Too bad," Susan said with a giggle. "It would've been kind of romantic to walk in his shoes."

Lucy sighed and flung herself on the bed, speaking before Donovan could say anything to Susan.

"I shan't wear any shoes at all. I like going barefoot—and I don't think there'll be many splinters."

"I suppose we can buy some new shoes when we reach the Lone Islands," Susan said. "There used to be a good shoe shop there…in Narrowhaven, I think?"

"You'd know," Lucy murmured, rubbing the material of her tunic between her fingers. "Donovan, why don't you like being called by your first name?"

Donovan shrugged as she smoothed down her new tunic and hung her dripping other clothes on a chair. She moved to the window and stared out at the splashing waves for a while before answering.

"Cordelia's so old fashioned," she said at last. "A lot of my friends call me Don—some do call me Cory, but it's mostly family—great aunts and everything."

"I hate being called Pevensie," Lucy said vehemently. "I don't understand why schools make you go by your last name. I had to be Pevensie Minor one year when I was in the same school as Susan, and it's so dreary to have no one call you your first name save best friends. And then only in secret."

Donovan, who had been brought up in an area where the school children always addressed each other by first names, felt a little awed.

"Oh, come on, Lu," Susan said, drying her hair with one of the other tunics. "If everyone went by first names there'd be a mess of Johns and Ediths to wade through—teachers would go crazy trying to keep everyone straight. At least last names are a little more individual, even if you do get 'Minor' or 'Major' added on the end sometimes."

Donovan thought this the first iota of sense the older Pevensie girl had yet demonstrated in this adventure. Perhaps it was because she wasn't in Caspian's presence, but she seemed almost human. Lucy got up and came to stand by Donovan. Looking out the window, the younger girl gave a sigh and shook her golden hair, which was drying fast, in the salty breeze.

"I have a feeling we're in for a lovely time."

Donovan couldn't have said it better herself.

o0o0o

Meanwhile, the boys followed Caspian below decks to a little room past the rowing-part of the hold. There was one bunk, but Caspian mentioned hammocks so Connor had a feeling he wouldn't have to sleep on deck after all. They changed into dry clothes except for Eustace who was sick again and declared that he was not going back on deck, so Edmund shoved him onto the bunk and Eustace just lay there. They ended up leaving him moaning and went up on deck again without him.

The loose tunic felt peculiar to Connor, but he didn't really feel awkward until they met up with the girls in Drinian's cabin and Donovan started giggling at him.

"What's so funny?" he asked, looking down at himself to make sure he hadn't put it on backwards or inside out. "What have I done now?"

Donovan had undone her French braids, and her red hair now hung loose, damp, and slightly curly to a little past her shoulders. She looked very Narnian in her light blue tunic, which fell to her knees. It looked like a dress, a pretty summer frock of some sort—and that's when Connor realized why she was giggling and tried, unsuccessfully, to suppress a blush.

"Hey, it's Narnian. Their highnesses are wearing them too."

"I know," Donovan replied, almost choking as she tried to stop laughing. "But I do wish I had my camera. This almost makes up for the Lasaraleen/Puddleglum prank."

"No one can prove that one was my fault," Connor insisted, tugging at his tunic and wishing it was longer. Maybe Caspian would lend him some leggings later. "As far as I know, I haven't been given the ability to send Priority 1 messages."

"Details, details," Donovan said, grinning. "Just give up and admit it was you."

Connor shook his head and put a hand to his stomach. He was beginning to feel queasy again…blast the rolling motion of the ship.

"Never. I'm sticking with my alibi—there were lots of people on when I posted the prank Suspian fanfic who can swear to my being _there_, not on the NCK communications website."

Donovan game him a look.

"Connor. It's the _internet_. You can be multiple places at once on the _internet_."

Before Connor could deliver a blistering retort, there came an enraged shout from the others, who had been carrying on the conversation the reader can find if he desires, at this moment, to pick up the book the Voyage of the Dawn Treader, Chapter 2, with very few changes because of Susan's presence and the Canon Keepers' background argument.

"WHAT?" Susan screamed, glaring at Drinian. "I BEG your pardon!"

Lord Drinian froze in midsentence at her interruption, and then began again.

"I said that my lord, the king, unhorsed many knights."

"No. The next part."

"And we thought the duke would have been pleased if the King's Majesty would have married his daught—"

"THAT part," Susan exclaimed, turning now her wild-eyed gaze on Caspian. "You wanted to MARRY her?"

"Um…no," Caspian began, beginning to look confused again. "She…um, squints and has freckles."

"Oh, poor girl," said Lucy.

"But you were IN LOVE with her?"

"No!" declared Caspian. "I wasn't. Drinian and Rhince wanted—"

"How could you be IN LOVE with her when you love ME? Or did you forget about 'I wish we had more time together' and kissing me goodbye before I left you, you CHEATER?"

There was a moment of silence that was soon broken by the sound of mind-wiping spray. Connor stared at the bottle for a moment and then muttered, "At this rate, I'll be out before we land on Felimath."

"Caspian," Susan began, but Donovan grabbed the Su's arm and dragged her off.

"Just a minute, your Majesties," she told the others. "I have something I want to ask Queen Susan…like what kind of idiot are you trying to be?" She hissed the last at Susan, quietly, so that none of the others could hear her. The blue-green eyes widened and Susan looked shocked.

"How dare you—"

"Listen, your highness. I'm a Canon Keeper, sent by Aslan to keep the Canon safe and you," she poked at Susan fiercely, "are threatening that safety. I don't know how you got into bookverse—or even on the Dawn Treader adventure at all—but you can either listen to me or spend the rest of the voyage tied up in the hold. And believe me," Donovan added threateningly as Susan opened her mouth to protest again, "I can do it."

A moment followed in which Susan sulkily tried to think of an answer.

"Canon Keepers? I've heard of you. In fact, she—" Susan broke off and blushed. "I mean, I've heard that you're not very nice to people who are…well, out of place. I should be in America, but she said I could see Caspian again, and I really did…I mean, I was so tired of no one understanding, and…"

For once the angstiness failed to surface; the Su appeared to be sincerely upset, so Donovan allowed compassion to creep into her voice—sincere compassion.

"I'm sorry. I really am. Mr. Lewis would be rolling over in his grave if he knew what those movie-makers have done to you and the others. But right now you're in book-verse. This Caspian, as you may have noticed, is blond. He was not in love with book-Susan, so he doesn't understand why you think you're in love with him."

It almost seemed, then, that Susan was going to understand and promise to be good, but then a flash of suspicion appeared in her eyes.

"You're lying."

"I'm not."

"Well I don't trust you. She said you Canon Keepers were the enemy."

"If 'she' is the author of this horror of a fic," Donovan hissed, "then we probably _are_ her enemy. But that doesn't mean we're _your_ enemy. Look—I'm not asking you to go hide in some closet the whole adventure, but lay off on the 'twoo luv' routine and try to leave him alone, if you can help it.

"Connor and I are here to help you." _Sorta. _"What do you say?"

Susan hesitated for a long, long time, but at last she nodded, jerkily.

"All right. But I can't make any promises. It's part of our deal—the one I made so I could come back again."

"Just so long as you're trying," Donovan said wearily, and turned to rejoin the others.

o0o0o

Things were rather all right from that point out. Lucy cured Eustace of his seasickness with her cordial, but unfortunately he was just as nasty to everyone as before. The tour Caspian gave them of the Dawn Treader would have been magnificent had it not been for the brat's whining about it being a 'nasty little ship' and 'quite a toy'. Captain Drinian, to whom the two Canon Keepers had not been properly introduced, did a fantastic job of trying to pretend he wasn't annoyed, but there was a gleam of anger in his eyes every time Eustace made another sneer at _his_ ship.

Susan, however, was quite nice. After Donovan's talking to, she'd become much quieter and almost like book-Susan in that she was practical and motherly and a trifle worrisome. Of course, though, all those years of reigning movie-Narnia must be coming back to her; all the memories of voyages made by the Four Sovereigns to who-knows-where brought a sweet flush to her ivory cheeks.

It was determined that the three girls, Lucy, Susan, and Donovan, would share Caspian's cabin, and Caspian would bunk in the Stern Cabin with Eustace, Edmund, and Connor. After the tour they retired to the Captain's Cabin where they dined on freshly caught fish and veal from the Seven Isles, as well as a watered-down form of the Archenlandish Spiced Wine.

Conversations were struck up—Edmund asked Caspian about the Northern Giants (to whose answers Connor, an avid fanfiction writer, listened eagerly) and Lucy began talking to Drinian about ships. Eustace haughtily refrained from speaking to anyone and picked at his food with disdain.

Donovan, meanwhile, found herself under the bold scrutiny of Reepicheep. She returned it, letting her eyes wander over the bold dark fur, the plump, aristocratic crimson feather, and the smooth golden circlet that circled one roundish ear. His whiskers were curled slightly, which gave him the look of a gentleman with a luxurious moustache. Indeed, Donovan thought with an internal snicker, it must be a _mouse_tache.

"It is an honor, Sir Reepicheep, to finally make your acquaintance," she said after a moment of awkward silence. "Your…exploits are told even in our world."

"I am surprised that such a thing might be," Reepicheep replied courteously, in a voice that didn't sound a thing like Eddie Izzard. "But this exploit, this voyage to the Utter East—perhaps it will be a tale worth telling."

"Any tale of yours is certain to be magnificent," Donovan replied, and then realized she'd made a pun. Connor would be proud.

"Are you a storyteller, then?" The mouse asked, eyeing her curiously. "A collector of lore and stories?"

"I…suppose."

"I thrive on tales of others," Reepicheep stated then, sighing and staring toward the window. "Heroic deeds and daring adventures…how I loved listening to the stories when I was a mouseling."

"You must know a lot of stories," Donovan added, sorry to be breaking the spell of the moment for the little adventurer, but curious to pursue this line of conversation. "Would…would you tell them to me? Your favorites?"

Connor, she knew, would want to know anything that might be related with Ancient Narnia, or really any stories that weren't in the books. She felt a flutter of excitement when Reep nodded slowly, causing the red feather in his circlet to bob about his ears.

"It would be my pleasure, Lady Donovan."

o0o0o

Supper did not last long after, and the nine who dined together parted yawning and bidding each other a sleepy goodnight. Drinian escorted the ladies to their cabin and provided them with a lantern and then left quietly, leaving the three girls to a contemplative silence.

"Who's to have the bed?" Donovan asked, rubbing her neck and wishing there was more than just one. "Queen Lucy? Susan?"

Although Lucy looked at it wistfully, she glanced at her sister and said, "You can have it, Su."

Donovan expected her to protest, but apparently the Su was not so much changed as to do that. Movie-Susan seemed rather ungrateful when tired, and merely climbed into the bunk murmuring, "Imagine sleeping in his bed!" and was asleep before you could say Jack Robinson.

Donovan dragged the eiderdown comforter onto the floor for Lucy and then rummaged around under the bunk until she found a thick—if somewhat threadbare—quilt for herself. She watched as the youngest Pevensie curled up near the window and looked out, watching for stars. Donovan leaned up against one of the walls, cushioning her head on one arm, and thought, as she dropped off to sleep, _Narnia. It really almost feels like home._

* * *

**_TBC..._**


	6. In Which Our Heroes Meet Pug

**A/N: Just ten days left until Voyage of the Dawn Treader comes out! There'll be atrocious mistakes, of course, and horrifying Canon breaks, but the NCK is hopefully awaiting the release of the third Narnia movie to make it to the big screen. Go to your midnight showing. Let's send a message to the box offices on December 9 and 10!**

**Meantime, enjoy the next chapter in which our favorite Canon keepers get into trouble...**

**Oo0o0o0o0o0o**

_Chapter 5: In Which Our Heroes Meet Pug_

Connor, meanwhile, was not so contented. Four in the tiny hold-bunkroom was much more crowded than three; it took ever so long for Edmund to get Eustace to stop complaining about feeling like a sardine and being hungry (he hadn't eaten much of dinner).

"I don't see why the girls get the nice room and I'm stuck down here. There's more room up there—room enough for four, I guess, and the three of them would be quite happy down here. Girls like being crammed together I expect, but I jolly well don't!"

"It's because," Caspian began with a patient-sounding voice, "they are girls."

Eustace snorted.

"As if _that _explains it. So what if they're girls? I bet they'd like being down here where it's warm and quiet and there's no one to disturb you. I don't see why I should be the one trapped down here in this black hole with all of you. A cousin's bad enough—he's crowding my room already back home (wherever home is)—but I don't think much of people who harbor Nazis." This to Connor, who just rolled his eyes. "And as for you," this to Caspian, "well…why can't you go sleep with the other sailors?"

"Because he's the _king_, Eustace!" Edmund growled. His eyes were blazing with ill-concealed anger. "If anything it should be you who's sleeping with the crew. Or in the girl's cabin, maybe. I'm sure you'd fit right in."

"That's another thing I don't understand," Eustace continued sulkily, giving Caspian another glare. "What kind of place is this where they don't know what a republican is? Or a British Consul. Or Cambridge. Or Nazis." This with another look at Connor, who rolled his eyes again. "I think you're all completely balmy."

After a long discussion in which Edmund got very angry and Eustace very sulky indeed (and Caspian and Connor tried to pretend they weren't there) there was silence only broken by the creaking of the ship's timbers. The hammocks rocked back and forth

Back and forth. Back and forth. Back and forth. Connor swallowed. He glanced at the window, the window that looked out into dark, cold water. Something splashed against it, something like seaweed. It waved back and forth at him, mimicking the motion of the ship. His stomach churned and Connor took a deep breath.

The others were all asleep, breathing evenly (or snoring) in their respective bunk or hammock. Why hadn't he been seasick before, back when Donovan had it too, or Eustace? Why was it affecting him now, now that he'd eaten a glorious Narnian dinner and been given a bed in the very belly of the Dawn Treader…back and forth, back and forth, back and forth.

At last Connor rolled out of his hammock (he was on the bottom) and staggered to the door. He had to be especially careful to keep quiet—no reason to wake the others just because he wasn't feeling well. It was agony climbing through the hold across the benches and up the ladder and when the salt sea hit his face, the smells made his stomach heave.

He made it to the railing in time and tried not to watch as the fishy contents of his plate now found their way back to the sea. He retched again and again until there was nothing left to lose. Always there was a moment of peace, a moment when the nausea left him be, but then it returned in gut-wrenching force and made him wish he'd never seen the blasted sea before. It came into his mind foggily that this was probably his just dessert (_Ouch!) _for laughing at Donovan when she was ill.

His throat stung. Every breath was an agony now, for the acidic liquid burned with each gasp. He wondered if this was it felt like to be dying.

A hand landed on his shoulder, heavy but gentle. As Connor vomited again, the hand remained, holding him to the sturdy deck of the ship.

"That's it, lad," murmured a voice. "You'll feel better when it's out of you."

The voice sounded familiar but at the moment Connor's mental facilities weren't in prime order and he couldn't place where he'd heard it before. He turned his head and caught a glimpse of dark brown hair and a beard and recognized the captain.

_Lord Drinian,_ he thought with a groan. _Just the person I wanted to know I was easily susceptible to seasickness. Well, now he knows I'm more of a landlubber than any of the others. Ouch!_

He briefly considered using his mind-wiping spray and then began berating himself for having such a silly idea. It wasn't to be used to save his own vanity—especially not with the long voyage that remained ahead.

"Look up at the horizon, not down at the waves," the captain ordered.

Connor obeyed, but the queasy feeling still did not ease. Indeed, it remained until he was quite sure nothing else existed inside of him. He waited a moment to see if the sick feeling would return, and when it did not gave a sort of sob of relief.

"Better?" Lord Drinian asked. Connor nodded, wiping his mouth and smiling feebly.

"Rather." He was silent for a moment, but then decided to tell the good captain everything. "I always get frightfully seasick a few hours after everyone else. Delayed reaction or something, I guess. I always think, 'Oh good, maybe I'm over it now,' but then it's back like anything, and worse each time."

Drinian watched with amusement in his dark brown eyes and nodded.

"Aye. I knew a lad like that once. Hardly a meal did he eat but he lost it over the side." He leaned back against the rail and stared out to sea, seemingly lost in his thoughts. Connor raised an eyebrow and finally lost his patience.

"And what happened?"

Drinian gave a start as if he'd forgotten Connor was there and then looked bemused.

"What happened to what?"

"The boy. Who got seasick. Did he ever…well, get over it?"

"Oh, him," Captain Drinian said, nodding as he thought it over. "I suppose he did get over it—managed to find his sea legs a day or so after they set sail and then took to the sea like a regular dolphin. His friends teased him about it, of course, because his father was a fisherman and he'd grown up on the sea, but when he became a Captain they gave it up. He still got seasick, though," the captain added thoughtfully. "Just managed to…well, hide it better."

With that he handed Connor a bucket and led him back to the ladder in the aft hatch. Connor paused at the top of the stairway and looked back.

"I don't mean to pry, sir, but what was the young man's name?"

"Drinian," the captain answered with a wry smile that reached his eyes. "He keeps a bucket like that one in his cabin for a night or so after weighing anchor."

o0o0o

Connor was as chipper as ever the next morning, although he did, in Donovan's mind, eat a suspiciously small amount of breakfast. After that meal Rhince turned up with everyone's clothes, which had been hung up in the galley to dry the afternoon before. Everyone changed back to their ordinary things, though it felt decidedly odd, and not very nice, to go back to wearing clothes from Our World when everyone else was still in Narnian things. However, Connor opted to stay in his Narnian clothes. He had a feeling that characters who were dressed as Canon Keepers might stand out more than extra characters who were not. Donovan disagreed: she was taller than Lucy, and the tunic just didn't feel long enough. Everyone looked at her a bit oddly when she came out of the cabin wearing her trousers, but everyone except Susan soon accepted this and politely ignored it afterwards.

Not much happened that first day. Connor ate as little as he could to avoid repeating the previous night (it seemed that he got sick chiefly at night, something he was rather grateful for) and Donovan snickered while watching Eustace scribble things down in his little black notebook. Drinian, who was a lot friendlier toward Connor now, showed him 'the ropes' of the ship, and Connor, most obligingly, took up some duties as part of the crew, though he did not actually join.

The next day there was, of course, the incident with Reepicheep and Eustace after which Reepicheep hardly spoke to anyone and Eustace had a bandage on his hand and wrote all the more furiously in his little journal. However as that adventure is described most wonderfully in the book, the writers of this account shall leave it for Mr. Lewis to tell.

The very same day, a little after lunch, they came in sight of the Lone Islands. Connor and Donovan were, of course, hardly surprised, but there was still something that rose up in them (aside from their stomachs) that felt like excitement. It was queer, the excitement, because they knew exactly what to expect on the islands—knew the adventure that would transpire on those green hills among the sheep and gulls, yet actually living the adventure made it that much more exciting, more adventurous, more _real_.

"Same old Felimath! Same old Doorn!" said Lucy, clapping her hands. "Oh—Edmund, Susan! How long it is since we saw them last!"

"I've never understood why they belonged to Narnia," said Caspian musingly. "Did Peter the High King conquer them?"

"Oh, no," said Edmund. "They were Narnian before our time—in the days of the White Witch."

Drinian asked about where they should put in, and Edmund replied that Doorn would be the best, for there were only herds of sheep on Felimath. Lucy responded, with a kind of joyful longing in her voice, "I'm sorry we're not landing on Felimath. I'd like to walk there again."

Donovan watched carefully as the clear blue eyes swept the little island wistfully. "It was so lonely—a nice kind of loneliness, and all grass and clover and soft sea air."

Caspian must have heard the wistfulness in her voice too, for he quickly added, "I'd love to stretch my legs now too."

Donovan looked up and met his eyes and they shared a moment of understanding. They both knew that if Lucy though it was nice, it most definitely was, but even more than that, there was something in the thought that this little queen had walked on the very shores and hills that stood before them—except she'd done it an age or two before this moment. Donovan shivered a little at the thought as Caspian explained to the others how it could be done.

At that moment Eustace and Susan came out into the open—Eustace from below decks, where he'd been sulking about the fight with Reepicheep, and Susan from the girl's cabin where she'd been adjusting her clothes and hair. She was wearing an outfit that made her look as if she was about to go to some low-key party or some sort of lecture. It was navy blue (which brought out her eyes and made her hair look velvety) and fitted her most becomingly, but of course as she'd kicked off her shoes when floundering in the water, she was barefoot.

"You'll come, will you?" Caspian asked them.

Susan nodded hesitantly, obviously worried about walking around sans shoes. Eustace agreed with a sneer about the ship to which Drinian reacted. Caspian played the peacemaker and smoothed it over with a skill that made Connor wonder how much experience three years as a king can give you, and then asked Drinian to lower the boat.

Before the king went over the railing, however, he looked back at Donovan and Connor who were watching rather wistfully and nervously (nervous because they weren't sure it was safe for Susan to be going without them) and asked with a grin, "Well? Aren't you coming?"

Connor's wondering was now not just wondering, and the two practically tripped each other in their haste to reach the ladder. Once they were down and seated in the boat, Connor whispered, "Why did you ask us along?"

Caspian grinned and raised an eyebrow as if the other was asking a question to which the answer was obvious.

"And leave me and the others alone with Queen Susan? You and Donovan might be trying to hide what's going on, but don't take me for a total simpleton. I know she's not the same Susan I saw before, and I'm not sure that mind-wiping spray you've got with you is working completely."

"Oh." Connor felt his face beginning to turn red and tried not to look embarrassed. "Well. I suppose it does simplify things if somebody knows."

"Don't worry," the king replied cheerfully. "I don't want to know anything more than I have to know. I've met people like you before, and they're usually on the right side."

Little more was said until the landing on the beach of Felimath, where Caspian bade the rowers to return to the Dawn Treader. They then set out across the hills, looking back every so often to remark on the curious appearance of the Dawn Treader, now that they were looking at her instead of riding on her. It took everyone—Connor and Eustace especially—a few minutes to get the hang of walking on dry land again, but even thought it felt like it was buckling under their feet, it was a comfort to know that it would stop soon.

Donovan was thrilled with Felimath. She and Lucy felt it the most, walking in silence and feeling the rich loneliness steal over them like a warm summer breeze. A lark was singing, a high melodious sound that made your heart want to take flight with it. The day was fine—a sky the color of a robin's egg with creamy clouds of a marshmallow's consistency. The springy turf looked and felt marvelously refreshing.

As they crossed one hill and came down on the side opposite of the Dawn Treader, the other islands appeared on the horizon: Doorn, large and green, and little Avra of yellow and purple. Narrowhaven was a splotch of white on Doorn's coast, the part closest to them. Donovan squinted and could just make out buildings and streets, but it was as observing something through a telescope or binoculars, and it was very fuzzy.

"Hullo! What's this?" said Edmund suddenly.

And abruptly, at the sight of the six or seven rough looking men who were sitting by a tree with weapons, the Canon Keepers were struck by a hammer of memory. They exchanged an agonized look—this was going to be difficult. Because they knew exactly what was about to happen, it was going to take every ounce of self-control in them to resist the urge to fight their soon-to-be-captors and allow the Canon to proceed as it should. _Botheration_, thought Donovan with a grimace. _This won't be any fun._

There was a slight discussion among the others about whether the Lone Islands were still recognized as Narnia in which the Keepers decided not to take part. Caspian had just informed Reepicheep that it was probably not within their best interests to re-conquer the islands with just the eight of them when the people stirred by the tree; they were now quite close.

"A good morning to you!" shouted a big black-haired fellow; he had very large hands, something that Donovan would notice more acutely a few minutes later.

"And a good morning to you," said Caspian. "Is there still a Governor of the Lone Islands?"

There was nervousness in his voice, but it was well concealed.

"To be sure there is," said the man, shifting his weight and taking a swig out of the jug he was holding, "Governor Gumpas. His Sufficiency is at Narrowhaven. But you'll stay and drink with us."

It sounded more like a statement than a request, but Caspian denied politely and said that they would continue on and for a moment Donovan thought, for a terrifying moment, that the men were going to let them because the Narnians quite outnumbered them. However the big man shook his head and said, "Ah. That you won't. Take them, boys!" and an all around scuffle began.

Caspian's sword was the first out of its sheath, but Edmund's wasn't far behind. Connor and Donovan reached for their stun-guns out of mere habit, but because they weren't working they'd left them aboard the ship so it was no good. Nor would they have used them had they been able too, for this was Canon they were thinking about changing.

No matter what kinds of amazing swordsmen Caspian and Edmund were, the black-haired man and his friends were rotten players, and had surrounded the two kings and pinned their arms back before they could fight back. Donovan herself found herself wrapped in strong arms belonging to a face that leered at her in a way she didn't like. She yelped and Connor was there, cursing and swinging like an Irishman. Her attacker, holding her with one beefy hand, dealt the youth a backhanded swipe that sent him sprawling.

Even though there were really more of the Narnians than there were of their attackers, the pirates (for that was, of course, exactly what their attackers were) were both larger and stronger than the children and mouse and soon overpowered them. Donovan's captor twisted her hands behind her back—not cruelly, merely firmly—and tied them with what she instinctively knew to be a very secure knot.

_Some Canon Keeper I am, _she thought wearily as she looked around and saw that some of the others were still fighting against capture. _First caught and bound._

But deep down, she hoped it was because she knew that she had to be caught and bound. All of them did. It was in the book and therefore inevitable. It still felt like cowardice to just give in and let them take you, though.

Donovan's man threw her against the tree and stumbled drunkly over to help subdue the others. Feeling too bewildered or lightheaded to try anything, Donovan stayed where she was put until another man approached dragging Lucy behind him. Quietly he brought a longer length of rope forth from a pouch and tied the two of them together, leaving about a foot or so of rope between them. Instead of joining the fray again, this man remained to guard them.

Donovan and Lucy watched as the others were taken, one by one, and bound with their hands behind their backs. It was odd to see how each responded to the capture—Edmund looked determined and slightly angry; Susan was furious and dignified, even bound; Connor looked dazed, and his lip was bleeding. Eustace was blubbing again and Reepicheep, who would not be tied or held still, writhed in his captor's grip and had apparently been using his teeth.

"Coward! Poltroon! Give me my sword and free my paws if you dare."

"Whew!" whistled the Pug, the slave merchant (for that is what he was). "It can talk! Well, I never did. Blowed if I take less than two hundred crescents for him."

"So that's what you are," said Caspian, whose rage was ill-concealed in a pair of blazing eyes and a look that was almost a snarl. "A kidnapper and slaver. I hope you're proud of it."

"Now, now, now, now," said Pug. "Don't you start any jaw. The easier you take it, the pleasanter all round, see? I don't do this for fun. I've got my living to make same as anyone else."

Edmund snorted.

"Where will you take us?" asked Lucy, getting the words out with some difficulty, for the guard wrenched her and Donovan to their feet and was shoving them toward the others. Edmund and Caspian suddenly looked very concerned, as did Connor, though in a confused sort of way.

"Over to Narrowhaven, for market day tomorrow," the slaver responded.

"So much for buying new shoes," Donovan heard Susan mutter under her breath.

"Is there a British Consul there?" asked Eustace.

There was a moment of silence as everyone stared. Perhaps we cannot blame Donovan if, at this minute, she let out a snicker and tried to pretend it was a sneeze, because this was one of her favorite lines.

"Is there a which?" said Pug at last, watching Eustace with something like curious bemusement.

"A Consul. Is everyone ignorant to the basic diplomatic procedures? You see, a government establishes a Consul in a foreign country to assist and aid the citizens in residence, and to look out for its own interests there."

There was another second of silence as Eustace took another breath, preparing to continue, but Pug interrupted: "Well, I've had enough of this jabber. The Mouse is a fair treat but this one would talk the hind leg off a donkey. Off we go, mates."

The men dragged the others over to Lucy and Donovan and secured them to the rope. Connor was tied in front of Donovan, fortunately, and as they were waiting for the others to be tied as well (Caspian was struggling magnificently, even though it only earned him a cuff on the ear) she edged forward and nudged him with her elbow.

"Con? You all righ'?"

Connor blinked as though he was waking from some sort of trance and then turned halfway, although he didn't look at her, and mumbled, "Tirian."

That was unexpected. "What?" asked Donovan.

"I feel like Tirian," Connor answered thoughtfully. "'What worried him worst at the moment—for it is often little things that are hardest to stand—was that his lip was bleeding where they had hit him and he couldn't wipe the little trickle of blood away'—"

"Quiet, you," snarled one of Pug's men, and dealt Connor a glancing clout. Connor grunted but made no further protest. He turned to Donovan when the men were busy with the others (now it was Reepicheep giving them so much trouble) and finished, "'although it tickled him.'" Donovan really couldn't help but giggle.

One of the slavers, the man who'd been her captor, shoved her roughly so that she almost tripped.

"Be quiet," he growled, glaring darkly at her from underneath thick, dark eyebrows until Donovan felt, again, the faintest trickle of fear. "Slave."

* * *

_**To be continued...**_


	7. In Which Connor Does Something

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Chronicles of Narnia.**

**A/N: Lion's mane, it's been a long while since last I updated! Hope this chapter finds all my readers well and content in the new year. Unfortunately, now that the movie VDT is out, our Canon Keepers will have a little more trouble with their already unruly adventure (although it may not show for several chapters more). Hope this chapter contents thee. Enjoy!**

* * *

_Chapter 6: In Which Connor Does Something_

The eight captives plodded along as the sun beat down on the back of their necks. Donovan was sure that they had walked for three hours for the sun was now at its zenith instead of straight in front of them. When the slavers stopped in front of a longboat on the beach, Donovan inched over to Connor, who still looked slightly dazed.

"What's wrong?" she whispered. "You look a bit dazed."

Connor shook his head. "I've got a headache enough to burst. And my lip is starting to really hurt." He winced, which added authenticity to the latter comment.

"You look kind of funny with super puffy lips," Donovan said with a smirk. "Like Anna Popplewell or Keira Knightley."

"Oh, go away," Connor mumbled, trying not to move his lip much. He and Donovan looked at out the bedraggled ship and sighed. Hopefully, Lord Bern would come any time now regardless of the fact that the Canon had been broken a thousand other times.

"Now, youngsters, let's have no fuss now," the slaver said, leering at Lucy, who inched closer to Donovan as if for reassurance.

_I can't leave her,_ Donovan thought, because for an instant that blonde hair was not Lucy but one of her own sisters, and an ache of compassion and protectiveness overwhelmed her. Queen Lucy was the darling of the Canon Keepers—it was always taken for granted that she and Aslan were among one's favorite characters. If Donovan could have done anything then to protect the queen, she would have…until she realized something painful.

She couldn't. The Canon must proceed as planned…even if it meant seeing Lucy and Edmund and Caspian getting knocked around by the slavers and sold on an auction block. But when she glanced at Lucy again, she thought, with a grin, that maybe she didn't need protecting. The girl's face was stern and brave looking, even as she blinked back tears. Also, both Caspian and Edmund were watching her like they would've broken their own arms to keep her safe. This comforted Donovan, somewhat: to know that there was a Canonical protection for the valiant little queen.

Another thing: she couldn't let her emotions get the better of her. This was Lucy—not her sister or friend or responsibility. Well…sort of responsibility, but not exactly. Donovan shook her head. She had a duty to leave with the Su as soon as possible. No attachments. That was Rule #1 at NCK control center. Not only was it important in cases like this, but if romantic attachments were formed (which had been known to occur if one let one's guard down)…well, that made the NCK part of the bad fanfiction problem.

"Well, Pug, what's this? More of your usual wares?"

Donovan looked up at the wry, somewhat impatient voice and saw a man with a neatly trimmed beard strolling towards them from the steps of an inn. She and Connor looked at one another hopefully. So the Canon wasn't damaged _that_ badly yet. Just as well.

Donovan turned and watched as smarmy Pug bowed, kissing up to the lord. _T__rying to earn some favor in the good lord's eyes so he can sell one of us off to him, _Donovan thought, somewhat repulsed by the way the pirate groveled. _Though Lord Bern is very more Narnian than Lone Islander—astonishing, really. _

"How much for that boy?" the lord asked, cutting Pug off in the middle of his rigmarole.

"Which, my lord?" Pug asked.

"That one. The one with the blond hair."

"…which, my lord?" Pug asked again, grinning grotesquely and bowing.

Donovan froze and turned to look at Connor. His dazed look had vanished, and he now appeared to be very, very worried. Because he and Caspian were both blond. They looked back at the lord, who was looking from Connor to Caspian with a fascinated stare.

"That one," he said at last.

_**And he pointed at Connor.**_

"Um, sir?" Connor wetted his lips nervously and shuffled his feet. "Um, you really don't want me. I'm set on escaping and I eat like a centaur. You'd have no end of trouble, and I think you'd really be a lot happier if you bought—"

One of Pug's men—the one called Tacks—boxed Connor's ear. He yelped and fell to one knee.

"See, that one," Connor continued, gesturing at Caspian, who was watching with some confusion, "that one you want. He's my…um…brother. Older, you know. Heir to our father's…land."

"Connor," Caspian said warningly.

Tacks grabbed Connor's arm and dragged him to his feet.

"You shut up," the big man said, holding up a fist. "Or this gen'lman's property will be damaged."

Connor craned his neck and saw Lord Bern counting coins into Pug's hand. Desperately, he jerked away from Tacks' grip and dove toward Caspian. And when he got there, he did the strangest thing he'd ever done—hit him in the mouth.

Caspian jerked back and yelped, more out of surprise than pain.

"What are you—"

"You rotten little!" Connor tackled the other to the ground, and then, while an uproar began around them, hissed, "Pretend to be me. You have to go with this man."

"It won't work," Caspian returned. "We don't look that much alike! And your shirt is bigger than mine, and your feet aren't as—"

"Maybe they won't notice," Connor hissed, hoping that somehow, maybe, it might possibly work. A second later fingers closed on his tunic and another of Pug's men—not Tacks—dragged him to his feet. The Canon Keeper, wiping blood from his cut lip, glared at Caspian, who was also being righted, and said, "What was that for?"

He was impressed that the king didn't even look confused.

"I know what you're trying to do!" Caspian snarled, so fiercely that Connor almost lost face and looked astonished. "You're so bloody protective—won't let me try to help you by convincing this man—"

Tacks appeared, and his fist, but Caspian (amazingly) ducked his blow.

"Really, sir," he said to Lord Bern, shifting his weight. "It's him you want."

Pug's face was red with rage, and he looked about ready to throttle Connor and Caspian both, but as he stepped toward the boy king, Lord Bern stopped him. Connor was surprised to see that the lord was trying to hide a smile.

"Wait, Pug. I'll take them both.

"Two for one hundred and fifty crescents?" the pirate shouted, scowling. "You'll pay double for both! They're strong lads, and I could sell each for four hundred on the market—still letting them off cheap, I am, for three hundred each."

Tacks caught hold of Caspian at last and cuffed his ear. Lord Bern raised an eyebrow.

"But they're damaged, you see. Two bloody lips, some missing teeth no doubt, and that one's half deaf now I'd reckon. Two hundred for both."

"Five."

"Two-fifty."

Pug grimaced and turned away.

"Sorry, my lord, but alas I have better things to do than give slaves away like charity. Perhaps some other time…"

"Curse you, Pug," said Lord Bern, glaring at the man coldly. "You are a pirate. Three hundred."

"Make it four and we've got a bargain."

"Three fifty."

Pug looked thoughtful, but right then Connor wriggled almost free of his man's iron grip and the pirate gave him a belt that rattled his teeth and made his eyes swim. Lord Bern met his gaze and said, "Three hundred. I won't pay above the original price for damaged property."

The slaver turned a venomous look on the others that encompassed Connor, Caspian, and his men, but then nodded jerkily to the lord.

"Three hundred crescents, then. Shouldn't wonder if I became a beggar after all this work for nothing."

"Unrope those boys, Pug," said Bern with a small lifting of the corners of his mouth that could've been a smile. "And look—treat those others well while they're in your care, or it'll be worse for you."

"Blown if I ever do—I treat them like my own dear children," said the slaver, gazing fondly at Lucy.

"Quite likely enough to be true," Lord Bern retorted acidly. Then he gestured to Connor and Caspian, (Tacks had glared at them fiercely while untying them, but hadn't dared strike them again for fear Pug would be angry) and said, "This way, lads."

Lucy cried out after them, and Donovan saw Edmund give his sister a gentle nudge to remind her that Caspian didn't want to be known, not even now.

But then Susan decided to be difficult.

"Noooo!" she screamed, not to be outdone by her little sister, and fell to her knees. "My love—my love!"

And, blast it, Connor's hands were still tied so that he couldn't use his mindwiping spray. So he just had to endure a confused coughing fit from Caspian, as the other wondered whether she'd been talking to Connor or to him.

**o0o0o0o0o0o0o0**

Donovan watched the retreating three figures until Tacks, one of Pug's men, shoved her not ungently toward the longboat.

"In ye get, lass. And be quick about it."

She obeyed him with a somewhat sullen look, jerking at her ropes and wishing she'd thought of a way to keep them from chafing her wrists. Edmund's were loose (although not loose enough for him to slip free), and she thought she remembered reading about some trick of tightening the wrist's muscles so that the rope would fit looser after you relaxed. It was too bad she hadn't remembered it earlier.

Lucy was no longer crying, but she looked almost sick when she settled between Donovan and Susan on the floor of the longboat. Edmund, sitting a few inches away, was trying to watch both his sisters and the pirates, apparently wondering how he should react if the situation demanded it. Eustace was still screaming into his gag and glaring about with furious blue eyes. Reepicheep had settled near Lucy, and looked almost more frighteningly protective than Edmund.

They were rowed out to a small ship that was settled a league or so out from the mainland. It was a nasty little boat—rotten timbers made up the sagging hull and deck. But the sail was fresh canvas, and the ropes were well tended. Unfortunately the hold was more similar to the hull and deck than the canvas. It reeked of month old fish and worse, and was crowded with other unfortunate prisoners whom Pug had managed to capture.

Once in the hold (they tied her hands before her, and she remembered to tighten her muscles correctly so the ropes fell slightly loose), Donovan curled up against a wall and rubbed at her arms. It was warm down here, but there was a rank chill that hung in the air, and everything was slightly damp.

For the first time on this adventure, she wanted to cry—not because she was afraid for Connor or Caspian or herself and the others (she knew what would happen to them eventually)—but because she hadn't imagined it being like this. This was so real, the squalor and stench and hopelessness of the people around her. How glad they would be, she thought, smiling slightly, when Caspian ended the slave trade once and for all.

Edmund had gotten Eustace's gag off (at Lucy's demand, for though he would have done it eventually, it was singularly nice not to have to listen to his cousin's whining) and, as expected, Eustace Clarence Scrubb was telling everyone what for.

"And now see what you've got us into!" he sobbed, jabbing a finger at Edmund, who was looking annoyed, but subdued. "You and your magic paintings and other worlds. This is your fault, cousin—and that idiot's fault—and those Nazis fault—and that thing's fault too," he finished, glaring at Reepicheep.

"Couldn't you just put the gag back on?" Susan snapped, annoyed because she was trying to fix her hair but was finding it difficult with her hands tied. "It's not as if Caspian meant to get us captured. And anyway, he's probably in chains right now…or terribly ill…or in need of a rescue."

Donovan shifted her weight and rolled her eyes, but said nothing. Lucy was the one who spoke up.

"Do you…do you think he's alright? You don't think that man will do anything to him—to them," she added, glancing at Donovan. "He looked rather nice."

The Canon Keeper opened her mouth to say something comforting when Susan interrupted her and said, "Nice? He's a slave owner. And he knew this pirate, and that horrid friend of yours," this to Donovan, "made him buy my Caspian too. When he could've been left with us!"

Donovan wondered, for a moment, if Bern's choice of Connor had not been a device of the Author of this Accursed Fanfic (in which Susan was a Mary Su and in love with Caspian) to get Susan and Caspian alone together in a hold. Good thing Connor had worked it out.

"Don't worry, Lu," said Edmund quietly, the first he'd spoken since coming aboard. "They'll be alright. Aslan has a way of using bad things for good."

And it seemed that at the mention of the Lion's name, the darkness of the hold grew a little less oppressive.

* * *

**_To be continued..._**


	8. In Which Bern Does Something

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Chronicles of Narnia.**

**A/N: G'day, my friends! In truth, it hath been a long time since this story hath been updated. But at last I've had time to sit down and write (*cough* something other than a certain Letter Game *cough*) and this is what resulted.**

**And I'm dedicating it to Donovan, because it's her birthday.**

* * *

_Chapter 7: In Which Bern Does Something_

Caspian, however, was having a much more interesting time. And Connor, too, of course, although he was beginning to wish he'd let someone else have this assignment. He couldn't decide whether to praise the Lion that he'd gotten away from the slave traders, or be proud that he had kept the Canon going, or be angry at himself for leaving Donovan in a compromising situation. Not only had he left his partner in jeopardy, but he had left her with Sued-Susan.

Which was, in it and of itself, a punishment_._

He kept imagining what might have happened if Lord Bern hadn't had enough on hand to buy both of them. Or if he'd decided not to buy a slave today. It gave the Keeper shudders, really, and he'd only just gotten a hold on himself when Lord Bern stopped ahead of him.

They'd been marching up a steep pathway, edged by rocky ground. The path itself was uneven (and the two new slaves barefoot, both!), and Connor stumbled over a loose stone, almost knocking into Caspian, who was ahead of him.

"If you hadn't done that," Caspian muttered, just loudly enough so that Connor could hear him, "we would still be with the others."

It really hadn't occurred to Connor that Caspian wouldn't understand his reasoning. But of course, he knew the end of the story and Caspian didn't.

"I'm sorry, Sire, but I couldn't let you stay with the others," Connor replied. "It's part of the reason I'm here."

"I'm starting to think you and the false Susan are working together," the king hissed at him. "Do you realize that we just left three ladies—not to mention a king, his kinsman, and one of my knights—in the hands of pirates and slave traders?"

"Yes," Connor murmured, with all his heart, because the realization stung him more and more every moment. Supposing something happened to Donovan—or to all of the girls. If the Canon kept stretching like this, making allowances for these little things, something might break.

"They were under my protection," added Caspian miserably. "If it hadn't been for you, at least one of us would've been there to watch out for them."

"I know," Connor replied, stumbling again. "You're just going to have to trust me. Or if not me, trust Aslan."

Caspian did not reply immediately to that, but a few seconds later, they reached the top of the hill and Lord Bern turned to look at them. His gray eyes looked very, very stern, and Connor swallowed even though he knew the man was a friend. The lord reminded him of one of his superiors back home—and lion's mane, could he glare!

"If you've finished arguing, I'd like an explanation for that piece of acting you put on back there. You." He turned that glare on Connor and looked him up and down. "What did you have to gain by tricking me into buying your brother rather than you?"

Connor squirmed. "I hadn't really thought that far, sir. Just that he looks more like our…his…_father_ than I do."

Lord Bern's eyebrows came down into a furrow that showed he did not understand. Caspian let out an exasperated sigh and said, wearily, "I'm sorry, sir. My brother…he gets strange ideas, sometimes. Don't you, Conn?"

"Your father, you said?" Bern muttered, turning his head to one side as he studied Caspian's face. "But surely…ah, no matter. You needn't look so frightened—I'll treat you well."

He turned to start walking down the path again, and his gait was slightly tired, and disappointment was spelled out in the way his shoulders bowed. Connor felt ice down his back, for this was the crucial moment.

"If you please, sir," he said, biting his lip and hoping he wasn't being too impudent, for a slave. "Why did you buy us? Both of us?"

Lord Bern turned halfway and smiled faintly at him.

"Both of you because you amused me. I had my eye on you originally because…ah, but it was a passing fancy. It could not be."

"What, my lord?" Connor pressed. He felt Caspian's hand on his arm, warning him, but he was so close. "Please—I must know."

A flicker of impatience passed through Bern's eyes, but after a moment he said, "Very well. You reminded me of my master: King Caspian of Narnia."

Caspian's hand tightened on Connor's arm, but this time he stepped forward instead of trying to pull the Keeper back.

"My lord," King Caspian said, standing straight and tall and looking very kingly, indeed. "I _am_ your master. I am Caspian, King of Narnia."

The silence that settled on them then was broken only by the lapping of the waves on the shore below and the cry of the seagulls as they dove from the sky to snatch at fish in the salty water. There was anger in Lord Bern's eyes.

"You make very free. First you are impudent and now you mock me. Do you take me for a fool more simpleminded than those pirates back there? Believe me, boy," he said, as Connor tried to interrupt, "I am not a man given to violence, but I will not tolerate mockery. If you cannot be grateful for being saved from the slavers, at least be silent rather than mock an old man in his dotage."

Caspian said, "By the Lion's Mane," just as Connor cried, "I'm not his brother!" They exchanged a look and then Connor jumped forward to grab Bern's arm. Bern turned and struck him—sharply, but not cruelly.

"He is Caspian! The Tenth!" Connor said, falling to his knees and spreading his hands to show that he wasn't trying to attack the lord. "I'm a crewman on his ship—he sails to reclaim the islands!"

Bern looked like he was going to explode in a furious barrage of words, but now Caspian stepped forward and put a hand on Connor's shoulder.

"More than that, sir. I know within six guesses who you are. You are one of those seven lords whom my Uncle Miraz sent to sea, and whom I have come out to look for. Argoz, Bern, Octesian, Restimar, Mavramorn or—or—I have forgotten the others, I always do. And if your lordship will give me a sword I will prove on anyone's body in clean battle that I am Caspian, the son of Caspian, lawful King of Narnia, Lord of Cair Paravel, and Emperor of the Lone Islands."

The blood had drained from Bern's face, but his lips were still pressed closely together.

"By heaven—it is his father's very voice and trick of speech. But you yourself called this boy your brother."

Caspian looked straight into Lord Bern's eyes.

"Are we not all brothers under the Lion?"

And as Lord Bern knelt and swore fealty to his king, right there in the middle of the field, Connor felt quite sure that he had done the right thing.

Once the initial thrill of victory had faded, cold fear set in. On board the Dawn Treader, Connor was hard pressed to keep from backing Caspian as he argued for a direct attack against Pug. Every time he closed his eyes he saw Donovan staring back at him, watching him and Caspian walk away to leave them with slavers. What was she doing, right now? Was she keeping an eye on Susan? Worried about Lucy? Worried about him? And now he saw her even when his eyes weren't closed. No wonder Caspian had been so adamant in arguing for a direct attack.

He sat by himself in the cabin while the others argued about what to do. Fiddling with his waterlogged STARDD (Synchronized Time and Relative Dimension Device) was turning out to be rather difficult without a screwdriver. Connor could take almost anything apart with a screwdriver. Using the tip of a dagger was better than nothing, but his fingers were covered with little things like paper cuts and the blood made things slippery. And now that he had the backing off he hardly knew where to begin. He didn't think he could fix the thing, but anything to keep his mind off Donovan was better than nothing.

Presently the others were finished talking, and had decided on the plan used in the book—sail down the channel, send off false signals, head to Bernstead for the night. Connor gave up fiddling with his travel device and went below to help with the rowing. As he took his turn at the oars with the others, he learned that he was sore in several places (especially his ribs) that had been rather banged up during the fight. He noticed Caspian wincing once or twice as he rowed, as well.

To keep his mind off Donovan (after all, what good could he do by worrying about her?) Connor quoted to himself. It was something he was very good at—remembering dozens and dozens of quotes from the Chronicles, not to mention all his other favorite works. When he got to Shakespeare he quoted it aloud for his oar-mate, who then had to have Hamlet's soliloquy explained to him because he did not understand. No one did, really, since the prince was supposedly either mad or pretending to be mad by then. And then Connor remembered that Rilian had been compared to Hamlet in Silver Chair and went off into another round of quoting to himself, so that by the time they reached Bernstead, he was rather too distracted to worry and his oar-mate was about ready to bloody his lip again.

They entered a good harbor on Avra's southern shore where Bern's pleasant lands sloped down to the water's edge. Bern's people, many of whom they saw working in the fields, were all freemen and it was a happy and prosperous fief. Here they all went ashore and were royally feasted in a low, pillared house overlooking the bay.

Lady Cilla, Bern's wife, was a woman of medium height and gentle curves. Her face was kind and her eyes were soft blue, like a robin's egg. There were four daughters: Anna, Moriah, Mena, and Kathleen. Anna and Moriah were tall and dark-haired, yet though they were ladylike, they were not above teasing their father, or asking questions of Caspian and Drinian when their curiosity demanded. Connor found Mena, with plain brown hair and serious eyes, more to his liking, and Kathleen, who was seven, found him to hers.

She was the first one to meet them as the whole party marched wearily into Bern's keep—a flash of fair hair and light blue dress that Lord Bern caught and twirled around with a laugh before returning her to the ground.

"Is it the king, Papa?" she asked him, eyes shining. "You said he would come someday. Is it him?"

"It is, Kathleen," Bern said, tousling her hair playfully. "May I make known to you King Caspian the Tenth—the son of the king who was my friend."

Connor glanced over at Caspian, who had a gentle smile playing around his lips, and was not at all surprised to see the king go down on one knee before the little girl.

"Lady Kathleen," he said seriously, taking her white hand and pressing it to his lips. "It is my honor and privilege to meet you."

The seven-year-old dipped into a curtsey, but when she raised her head again, there was a furrow in her brow.

"No one's ever called me a lady before," she said, and then grinned. "Anna and Moriah will like you, if you call them ladies too."

Bern skillfully turned a cough into a laugh, but Caspian's expression did not change. "I hope you like me too."

Kathleen nodded. "I think I do. Because you're not just handsome, but nice too."

This time everyone had trouble with coughing. Caspian thanked her nicely and stood and followed Bern inside. Connor hesitated before going in, because the little girl was still standing by the door and looking pensive. She looked up at him, when she saw that he had stopped, and looked surprised.

"You're just like him."

He nodded. "But he's the king."

Kathleen wrinkled her nose. "I guess he can't be my friend, then. I like him, but he might think I should be a lady and I'm not."

Connor thought that Caspian would expect nothing of the sort, but he did not say anything.

"What do people call you, if not Lady Kathleen?"

The girl turned her bright eyes to him and said, "Oh, I'm just Kathy, mostly."

She held out her hand, and Connor shook it, as he was shaking with amusement.

"I'm Connor—and I think the king would like you whether you were a lady or not."

Her face broke into a broad grin. "Really?"

She was his fast friend from that moment on. Connor, of course, did not expect to be seated at the same table as Lord Bern and Caspian, being just part of the crew. It was nice, for a change, to be able to lean back in his chair and close his eyes and not worry about breaks in the Canon—because, after all, this was exactly where they were supposed to be. Anna and Moriah served their father and his esteemed guests at the upper tables, and a few pages and the brown-haired girl Kathleen pointed out as Mena served the crew and courtiers.

Connor at last got the somber Mena to sit down with him and the other crewmembers. And then they had a contest to see who could make her laugh. He won, and he could tell by the gleam in her eyes that she liked him, just as Kathleen liked him. And he liked her—liked all of Avra and Bernstead and the jolly people here.

And suddenly he felt a pang, somewhere above his stomach (so he wasn't just hungry) as he moved his elbow and felt the hard STARDD he'd strapped to his belt. The laughter died away and conversation turned to their adventures, as they regaled Lady Mena and Kathy with stories of the places they'd been. But Connor sat in silence and stared down at his plate.

Because he'd forgotten, for a while, that this was not his home. He'd forgotten, for a while, about going back. And the thought of giving up this—this joy and fun and happiness that existed within Lewis's world—was like deciding to give up food for the rest of his life. And then, thinking about going back made him think about Donovan, stuck in the hold of that awful slave ship, and he grew even more miserable because here he was feasting and having a wonderful time and the others were sick and hungry and afraid.

The feast had ended, mostly, and he noticed Caspian sitting by the great hearth, staring into the flames and looking just as miserable as he felt.

So Connor went and sat beside him. Caspian glanced up for a second, and said, as Connor settled next to him, "I can't bear this waiting."

And Connor said, "Aslan's watching out for them. Tomorrow. Tomorrow we'll get them back."

At least, he hoped it would be so.

* * *

_**To Be Continued….**_


	9. In Which They Get Away

**A/N: Aye. Lots of updates in one week. I managed to steal some time at last. I'm not a very good thief for it was only an hour or so, but eh, an hour's better than naught, what?**

**OH! And Donovan joined Fanfiction AT LAST! She's the co-author of this fic (erm...at least, she would be if it wasn't a really for-true story), and her penname is ReginaRose. You can find her at this link: fanfiction ~reginarose (if you just remove the spaces around the dot).  
**

**So sorry for the ridiculously long wait. But things are about to get interesting, because the situation has shifted back in our world...but I get ahead of myself. :) Enjoy.**

* * *

_Chapter 8: In Which They Get Away_

Little need be said about Donovan but that she often woke with nightmares after the harrowing day or so that they were prisoners of the pirate Pug.

It wasn't that she didn't trust in the Canon and Connor and Aslan to get them out of the tight spot, just that she hadn't expected it to be so stressful.

Or annoying. She was both glad and frustrated that Eustace was bound several people away from her, because if he'd been close she might've forgotten her Keeper Oaths and either strangled him or gagged him (even though she was still tied up, she would've found a way).

At last, though, Susan and Edmund both snapped at him and Reepicheep added some biting comment and Lucy just sighed, so Scrubb gave up the complaining and started to blub again. Endlessly, pitifully, and utterly ridiculously. Donovan closed her eyes and leaned against the hold and imagined all the different things she could do to Connor when she got her hands on him. Or whoever was responsible for their devices malfunctioning.

This went on for what felt like an age. When morning finally came, Eustace had fallen into a sullen silence, and all the others watched the door when it opened with a sort of hopeless expectation. Lucy had gotten to know a few of the other slaves—many of whom were curious about Reep. Donovan just made sure she was near Susan.

They were taken on deck and lowered into the longboat again, and then rowed to shore by Pug's men. Narrowhaven had a large waterfront, but most of the boats docked were fishing boats, filled with men who did not stop their work to watch the slaves being marched by.

The slave market opened. One by one, they were sold. Lucy and Reepicheep were bought by a haughty looking slave, who was apparently acting for his master's wife who liked exotic animals and needed a new maidservant. Edmund and Susan went to a cruel looking man with an oiled beard—a Calormene, and by the way he eyed Susan, a nasty one. He almost bought Donovan too, but kept looking at her hair—bright red—and shaking his head. Apparently Calormenes didn't like gingers.

She stood on the platform and watched as other humans bid for her, planning to take her home like property. It was humiliating, to say to say the least, and almost more than she could bear. The only thing that kept her from lunging at Pug or her new master (a fat man with a nose shaped like a potato) was the thought that soon They would come—soon the Slave Trade would be abolished forever.

So when her new master turned and snapped his fingers for her to follow before Pug had finished selling a young Galmian girl (with Eustace added in on the side), her blood ran cold. For if she left now, she would not be there to be set free by Caspian.

Unfortunately, her master had no knowledge of these events (and doubtless would not have cared much if he had). He led her through the streets (or rather, his steward, who walked behind him, did) and put her directly to work in his garden, beside a large house. Donovan kept flinging glances over her shoulder, thinking about escaping, or hoping to see a face she recognized, but it was no good. The steward watched her kindly, but sternly, and kept a hand on her arm the whole time.

She was pulling weeds under the careful gaze of an overseer and wondering what on earth was going to become of her when she heard the sound of running feet. Donovan looked up and almost fainted of relief, as she shouted, "Connor!"

**0o0o0o0o0o**

For Connor had been thinking about her far too much during the episode with Governor Gumpas to not realize, within the first minute they came upon the slave market, that Donovan was not present. While Caspian proclaimed that the slaves were now free, he managed to pick out Edmund and Susan, Lucy and Reepicheep…but not the red-head he was worried about.

"She isn't here," he told Caspian the moment the king turned aside from greeting Lucy and Edmund and the others. "Donovan isn't here."

"CAPSIAN!" Susan cried, and flung herself at the king. Connor didn't even blink—his de-OC-ifying spray caught her mid leap.

"She's not here."

Caspian turned to Pug and asked about her (unfortunately the pirate was too miserable to give a straight answer), but Edmund told Connor, "The man who bought me and Susan said something about Lord Gaius, and one of the nicest plots in the city when he saw who bought Donovan. Do you think that'd do any good?"

Connor shrugged and took off at a run toward the street, but not before hesitating and then dragging a dazed Susan along with him. He stopped three people and asked where to find the house of Lord Gaius, and the third person, an old woman who was carrying a laundry basket, said she was headed that way. Politely (for although he was mischievous, Connor was also a gentleman), Connor offered to carry her laundry for her if she would take him there.

The old woman went on so slowly he thought he would burst of impatience. Susan was still too dazed to put up a fight, so Connor merely watched her as they walked along, prepared to drop the laundry and tackle her if it was needed. At last the woman reached a house and said this was where she stopped, and gestured down the street and said, "Three more down, with a large garden next to it. You can't miss it."

He thanked her hurriedly and took off, stumbling on the loose stones (despite the fact that he was now wearing his Standard Issue Boots again) and bringing Susan stumbling after him (she was snarling now that he should slow down because her feet hurt, but this wasn't the real Susan, so why should he care?). His heart was racing. He rounded the corner by the garden and almost sobbed in relief—for there she was, red hair coming loose from the braids and eyes filled with uncertainty and annoyance. Her whole face lit up when she saw him.

She shouted his name, but by then he was over the fence and smothering her with a hug. Donovan grabbed his arms as he pulled back and was smiling. Smiling. As if she hadn't just been sold for a slave because he'd gotten there too late.

"I'm sorry—I'm so sorry—took longer than we'd thought—you're alright?"

"Connor." Donovan shook him once to get him to stop babbling and said, calmly, "You did right. I'm fine. Now let's get out of here before my master shows up and wants to know why I'm not weeding."

There was a sound like a cough from the house, and Donovan and Connor turned to see the fat man standing there, watching them curiously.

"The King has declared slavery illegal," said Connor quickly. "Pug's been ordered to give everyone their money back."

"He saved me," Susan said, smiling dreamily. "Capsian saved me. He's so handsome—but why is his hair blond instead of brown?"

Lord Gaius stared at them for a long moment, and then said, "I was fortunate to find a slave with hair as red as poppy. I may not find another in ten years."

"I'm sorry," said Connor, looking very bold and heroic, "but she isn't a slave and you can't have her. If you have any problem with that you can take it up with the new Duke of the Islands—Lord Bern. Or the king."

The fat man said something very rude and Connor said something not very nice back but eventually he just turned and walked off, towing Donovan (who was towing Susan) behind him. The large-girthed lord stood and stared after them for a long time, but eventually just sighed, shrugged, and went inside the house, mopping the sweat from his brow with a yellowish handkerchief.

**0o0o0o0o0o**

After several weeks of feasting and meeting the family of Lord Bern (and wondering why Connor looked so sadly at a certain brown-haired girl named Mena when it was time to cast off), Donovan stared thoughtfully at the retreating shore of the island of Avra. She didn't know how they'd managed to keep Susan from assaulting Caspian for the span of time they'd spent there, but each day consisted of long walks and each of the Keepers taking turns to watch their bewildered charge. And although there had been one frightful event during the feast the night after they'd Freed the Lone Islands, both Connor and Donovan had performed their jobs moderately well.

Eustace was being sick again over the ship's side (Lucy was fingering her cordial thoughtfully), but all the others were in high spirits, as the adventure of Setting Out To See The Unknown _really_ began.

Comfortable in a practical dress which she fancied flattered her better than the old ship's tunic she'd been wearing (they'd purchased clothing in Narrowhaven under the direction of Lady Bern), Donovan glanced over at Edmund, who was staring at the receding shore with a very pensive expression on his face. He noticed her look and grinned shyly at her.

"There were pirates here in our days, too. Always have been, likely always will be, no matter who is king."

"Were there slaves then, too?"

The young king shrugged. "Plenty. It's a Calormene practice. They come here with their war galleys and have no qualms about buying other humans as property." He shivered and rubbed his neck. "No one should be treated like property."

Donovan smiled a little, thinking of a young boy who'd sold himself into slavery for Turkish Delight. "No. No one."

A few hours later, she was watching the sun set. It was an odd, yellowish color instead of the usual crimson, and set the sea to looking like sickly gold. She saw Drinian staring at the water, and wondered if something was wrong. It was far too early for the Sea Serpent attack. But then again…if this was one of _those_ fics…

"Oi!" Connor bounded on deck. Donovan turned and grinned at him, realizing that she hadn't seen him all day.

"Where've you been?" she asked, punching him lightly in the arm. "Mourning below decks because of a certain Lady—"

"Stuff it," he interrupted her, glaring a little, and then shoved something into her hands. Still grinning and wondering how to tease him further, Donovan looked down at the object. And let out a cry.

"Connor—the STARDD?"

The blond nodded an affirmative. "I cleaned the components and got everything connected again. It took a little creative wiring, and it's still low on energy, but I have an idea about how we can…" his words trailed off as he glanced around at the sky and sea. "Hullo. What's this? Bad weather?"

"Can't be," Donovan replied, fiddling with her braid and tinkering with the STARDD excitedly. "Storm's not for another few days. D'you think it'll get us and Susan back to the right time?"

Jerking his gaze back to her, Connor hesitated, and then shrugged. "It should. I was planning on using a boost from one of the stun guns. It's risky, but it might just work."

The wind was picking up. But the odd thing was that the sail hung loose one minute, and then snapped taut the next. Shaking his head, Connor scratched his head and began looking about for Caspian. "I don't like this. Something feels…off."

"Perhaps we shouldn't leave. Perhaps we ought to stay, even with Susan, and make sure it's going to turn out like it's supposed to."

Although it wasn't likely anything they could do would influence the weather or chain of events, Donovan was starting to feel panicked. So the adventure with the pirates hadn't been exactly the most thrilling Narnian experience she'd ever had. She was beginning to like it here—beginning to wonder how it would all play out. She'd even begun to think that they might be lucky enough to stay for all of it, be able to see Him, once the end had come. But now that the STARDD was fixed, all these thoughts were crumbling and blowing away in the gale like a handful of sand.

Connor shouted something to her, but she couldn't understand him above the wind. Drinian was shouting at Lucy and Eustace, and suddenly, there was Caspian, hair tousled and face grim.

"It's going to storm!" he shouted. Donovan had a sinking, and felt pretty sure, from the look that Connor gave her, that he did too. "Lady Donovan—get below and stay with the queens. Connor—"

He was cut off by the sound of someone shouting "CASPIAN!" There was a flash of green (Susan, too, had found a flattering dress at Narrowhaven), and the impact almost flung the fair-haired king to the deck. Something that sounded like kettledrums rumbled threateningly overhead, as Donovan and Connor both dove for Queen Susan simultaneously.

Something happened, then, almost as soon as they grabbed hold of her. The first was that Donovan thought, _Oh Aslan, _help! The second, was that her hand that was still holding the STARDD slipped so that one of her fingers jabbed one of the buttons.

The third thing was a little bit flashier: a bolt of lightning, slashing across the dark yellow clouds like a white-hot scar, hit the ship.

Well, to be more specific, it hit the STARDD (which was, as you may recall, a Synchronized Time and Relative Dimension Device). Donovan screamed as a static buzzing filled her ears, as every hair on her body stood on end. The sea, the storm, and the ship all faded from view, until all she could see was a blindingly white light that penetrated her skin and consumed her completely.

**o0o0o0o0o**

Inside a room which was entirely pink except where the shadows cast by the purple lava lamp formed a wicked shade of fuschia, a teenaged girl glared at the screen of her laptop and screamed something that might have been "LIEK NOOOOOOOO!111"

* * *

**_To Be Continued..._**


	10. In Which History is Rewritten

**A/N:** Um. So, the last time this was updated was about two years ago on August 11, 2011 and for that I am very **very** sorry. I honestly have no idea how everyone is going to react when they see the alert in their inbox...but I look forward to hearing what you think. Has my writing style changed in two years? (Good grief, guys, I am really awfully sorry about this! I will finish it now, I promise!)

Also, because of the long wait, I had a really interesting plot twist idea when I started back on this. So I hope it makes sense and you enjoy it. :)

**Laura Andrews, narniahannah (anon), Jesus' girl 4ever, Arrowhead 1996**-this chapter is dedicated to you, for poking the dead story that was curled up in a corner of my mind until it was jerked and screamed "I'M ALIIIIIIVE!"

**Thanks so much for everyone's patience with me on this one!**

Enjoy!

* * *

_Chapter 9: In Which History is Rewritten_

The first thing he realized was that everything hurt. Mostly it was his head, at first. If brains could blow fuses, than his was definitely in need of repair. Everything tingled slightly, and pain throbbed through his consciousness like a hammer smashing into a ripe pumpkin. So dulled were his senses that it was only when he realized that he was conscious of the pain that he realized he was conscious at all.

Opening his eyes with a herculean effort, Connor blinked and sat up slowly, ignoring the pounding in his head. Well, he thought. Not in Kansas anymore, Dorothy. Nor on the _Dawn Treader_, for that matter.

Donovan! He sat up and looked around, searching for his red headed partner. "Donovan!"

"Oh, my head!"

Flinching, Connor looked to his left and saw Susan slowly sitting up and looking around dazedly. Through his blurry vision, he noticed that there seemed to be less makeup on her face. A definite improvement.

With a sigh, Connor shook his head. "Go back to sleep, Su. Do us all a favor and stay that way. _Donovan_?"

To his relief, there came a very tired voice from not too far away. "Whatever just happened, I most definitely do not want to do again."

Gritting his teeth as he turned his head again (why did it feel like everything was spinning?), Connor found his partner and felt a twinge of relief at seeing that she seemed to still have all of her limbs. She looked him square in the eyes as she pushed herself up on her elbows and frowned. "I might say that that was time travel without a capsule. Boy, is that rough." She fell silent, and then added, rubbing her head, "I've got a blasted headache."

"Honestly, Don. I think quoting Doctor Who in Narnia Bookverse is probably breaking just about every rule we've ever been made to memorize." Connor snorted (which hurt) and then contented himself with smirking at his partner, who just shrugged. It was well known around headquarters that she was the resident Whovian.

A moan of pain to the Canon Keepers' left reminded them that Susan was still with them. Donovan sighed and dropped back to the ground with her hands over her face.

"Of course, she's still with us," she muttered, so quietly that Connor could barely hear. "Why couldn't the thing have sent her back so that we could stay and help repair the adventure?"

Cocking an eyebrow, Connor looked at his partner a little more seriously, waved his hand in front of her (hidden) face, and then wondered if he should check Donovan's pupils.

His voice only barely hid the concern he was feeling as he quipped, "Alright. That's it. Who are you and what have you done with Cordelia Donovan?"

"Shut it, Connor," Donovan shoved him away from her. "And don't call me Cordelia!"

"W-where am I?" Susan's voice sounded strangely shaken. Both Canon Keepers turned to look at her and froze. Now that Connor could see clearly, he realized that this was wrongwrongwrong because this was not movie-verse Susan.

Even sitting, she looked slightly regal. Her face was pale and haggard, but there was something indefinably _in charge_ about the way she fixed her eyes on the two other young people. She had twisted her tangled dark hair out of the way and fixed it in a no-nonsense knot at the back of her neck.

"Who are you?" she asked. The quaver was gone, replaced by suspicion. Connor jumped to his feet and brushed off his shirt nervously.

"Um. Your highness. We are—we're Canon Keepers. That is, I mean, we're from—"

"Wait." Susan lifted a hand. "Don't bother to explain. I am familiar with the Canon Keepers. Always popping up during our reign, with never enough memory spray to go round. But that doesn't answer my question fully. Who are you? And where are we?"

Connor's mouth had fallen open (Careful, his partner thought with a snicker, or you'll be catching flies), but Donovan recovered pretty quickly.

"I'm Donovan and this is Connor. We're in—well, in Narnia at a time when you aren't supposed to be here. It's rather a long story. Someone was writing about a Susan aboard the _Dawn Treader_ and it was movie-Susan, and we thought we had her with us, but now our STARDD device is broken and to be honest, your highness, I have no idea why you're here."

Susan Pevensie frowned. "Must be a ploy of that author. The _Dawn Treader_? And at a time when I'm not supposed to be here?" She sighed. "It's Lucy and Edmund, isn't it? They've gone back while I'm in America. Well. Good for them. I guess." She looked up at the sky and added, "Didn't think I'd be coming back. Not after last time."

"You weren't supposed to," Donovan replied, rolling herself to her knees and looking around, trying not to focus on the way her body protested to each movement. "Connor, shut your mouth. Where do you suppose we are?"

"Where do you think?" Connor replied, out of habit. He always quoted out of habit. Donovan was not amused. Mostly because it was movieverse.

"Well," she said, eyeing the long beach and the gently sloping green hills beyond,

"It doesn't appear that we've made it back to our world. Otherwise we'd either be in the transport station or in a hospital somewhere (neither of which appears to be the case). So, either our STARDD has gone wacky and sent us somewhere random where we've no idea of what's going on or how to get back (in which case we're more than sort of lost and in need of assistance) or we are still in Narnia, and will doubtless discover which island we're on if we explore a little."

Connor scratched his head. It sounded logical. "Do you suppose we've gone forward or backward in the journey? Supposing we're back on the Lone Islands? And have we moved in time?"

Donovan looked down at her STARDD. It was completely shot—wires protruding from the sides, the readouts all pointing to zero and slightly charred. Hopelessly wrecked, and after all Connor had done to try to fix it, too. Although the energy from the lightning had powered it enough to seemingly send them somewhere.

"No idea. I suppose we'll find out soon enough."

After managing to stop staring at Susan (what a relief to see her, after having to put up with movie-Susan!), Connor stretched his aching muscles and looked around at the beach. There was no sight of any other islands or (more importantly) a ship. As he rolled his neck, he let his mind try to sort out which islands they'd been to and which were next. He always got the middle islands in a muddle. The sequence was important, but somehow it was so hard to remember…was Dragon Island or the Sea Serpent attack first? Oh, Dragon, of course, because of Eustace and Caspian's second best sword.

He heard a sharp intake of breath from Susan as she moved to sit up. In an instant he was beside her, pushing aside the throbbing in his head because he was _so_ dead if _anything_ happened to the _real_ queen out of the regular timeline.

"Are you alright? What's wrong?" he asked, his voice betraying his anxiety.

She looked rather like she was going to be sick, holding a hand to her head. "I—it will pass. Feel a bit faint. Jove it hurts!"

Donovan's voice came from behind them. "Shouldn't we get moving? Look about. See where we are?"

"Don," Connor snapped, "she's hurt."

She was there a second later, frowning and laying a hand on the queen's shoulder. "What's the matter? Can you stand?"

Susan rubbed her forehead, eyes closed. "Not—not sure. I need a moment—just a moment, and I'll be alright."

Donovan glanced at Connor, who was looking a little too worried (hadn't he had a mission with book-Susan before? Oh dear) and made a decision.

"You go. Figure out where we are. I'll stay with her."

"But—"

"Connor. I'm invoking Section 2."

"That's ridiculous, I'm not—"

A brief conversation ensued that was completely unnecessary and really quite absurd in nature, but Donovan _would_ assume the worst so Connor acquiesced like a gentlemen and left the pale and shaken Susan in his partner's capable hands.

"It might be the Duffers," Connor said shortly before he left (he was only slightly annoyed), "so if you hear any thumping…"

His partner nodded grimly and a little impatiently. "Protect the queen. Got it."

Connor raised an eyebrow and shot back, "I was going to say hide. But whatever you like. I'm sure there's a regulation about that too."

He took off at a run, jogging inland away from the sea. He noticed something even through the fog of annoyance that was eating away at his reason: it was all so quiet—but not a dangerous quiet, like the quiet of Dragon Island, creatures living in fear of a greater beast that could burn them alive for supper. No, this was a contented quiet. A peace hung about the land—a sleepy wakefulness. It pervaded his senses until even the pounding headache drained away into one weary corner of his mind. He wondered if this was what the Wood between the Worlds was like.

Regardless, it was definitely an enchantment. That meant they would have to be wary, for if it was the Island of the Dufflepuds, even though they had no need to fear the magician, the Duffers could be…problematic. Especially without Lucy to fulfill the canonical duty of reading the spell to disenchant them.

After the initial burst of energy from the anger wore off, jogging was harder, because even the gentle slope of the hill teased his aching muscles and made him grunt with annoyance. He was not, shall we say, the most athletic of people. After all, he rather preferred lounging in the corner of a coffee shop with a good book or his trusty old laptop to any kind of sport or physical activity. Still, he did enough to keep himself ready. Just in case he found himself in situations where he had to carry a wounded companion (or protesting Sue) out of a story, or flee like mad from one of the witch's creatures (an ability he'd quickly picked up after learning the hard way that people who are too out of shape can't outlast a Were-wolf when it comes to running). However, this is all completely irrelevant to the story except for the fact that he was now a bit sore when it came to jogging uphill.

Fortunately, he did not have to jog for long. He stopped dead in his tracks when he caught sight of the gray pillars that jutted up out of the ground in a valley between several hills. It was a ruin (he'd always loved ruins), the tall stone blocks slightly worn by wind and rain and the gentle gnawing of time's teeth upon their towering forms. As he drew closer, he caught sight of the long table that ran the length of the small pavilion, and of the bushy masses that grew alongside it.

Well. Grew. They were actually men. Men with hair that had been growing for seven years as they slept beside the table which was the resting place of a stone dagger that was not fit for them to touch—the reason for their sleep.

A scathing curse grew in Connor's mind and was gently quashed by his sense of decency. He turned and took off toward the beach once more.

"STOP!"

He froze at the sound of that voice—so clear, so cool, so calm. Like a bell it shattered the quiet, but in a way that sounded like silver and not like a sword. He knew who it was before he turned. A tall slender girl, her long fair draped behind her, stood beside one of the pillars. Her eyes were bright and fierce, like diamonds, and held him in his place.

"Do not be afraid," she said, walking forward a little hesitantly. "Are you hungry? There will be food when my father and I have finished."

Her face changed when she was close enough to see him. There was a softening of the eyes—a hint of blush in her cheeks. _Lion's mane_, Connor thought, flushing a little himself. _Darned if Caspian and I aren't lucky fellows for being so fine-featured_.

"I'm…I'm sorry, milady," he stammered, recovering a little. "Not hungry—I'm looking for…for someone. Have you had any visitors in the last few days? A man who looked like me?"

His mind was reeling. What had happened, to fling them so far ahead in the story? Where were they in the timeline? He supposed everything was ruined now—the whole story, unless it had gone back to normal once they left.

He had a sinking when she flushed again and nodded. "They sought the world's end, and the sleepers who lie yonder at the table. Yet the king—your twin almost, in features and manner—the king took counsel from his companions and sailed home upon the day following their arrival in this land. His lady insisted on it. She feared this land, and the seas further east."

"Turned _back_?" Connor gasped in horror, raking a hand through his hair. "His _lady_?"

The girl nodded, a little sadly. "She had dark-hair and bright eyes. They were to be married, as was her brother." A glint of a smile entered her eyes. "It seems that romance blossoms aboard ships."

Connor's mind had stopped reeling. It had now sort of exploded. "Wait. Wait, her _brother too_?"

"Yes," replied the girl. "To the one with fair hair with two names. What was it? M-Mary—"

"—_Sue_," Connor finished. His blood turned cold and he felt like the world had just fallen to shambles around him. He was intensely aware of the cold, hard, broken STARDD that pressed against his hip.

Failure. He was a failure. Not only had they somehow lost hold of the movie-Susan they'd been sent to stop (it didn't take a genius to figure out the name of Caspian's dark-haired beauty) but they'd somehow let the author of the fic (a Mary Sue herself!) commandeer the story and steal Edmund away too.

He should've seen it coming. Should've been prepared for this. Should have thought to put the STARDD in something waterproof or…or something. And now—now he had no idea what to do.

"Are you well?" asked the girl. She was watching him with concern. Connor shook his head.

"No. No, I'm not alright. You were going to marry him—you would've been the queen, if it hadn't been for me and that freak accident and all the mistakes I've made along the way. But I'm going to fix it." He began backing up, jerking the STARDD from his belt, eyes blazing (and no, they were _certainly not_ brimming with tears). "I'm going to make it right."

He turned to run, but tripped (in a very Connor-ish fashion) and was cursing under his breath when he felt a glow behind him.

"My son," said Ramandu. His eyes were so deep—Connor felt as though he was staring into time itself. "The Lion said you would come."

His breath was gone, just like that. It might've been a sob, or a gasp, but he could not speak a word—not a word.

And then, at last, he could speak. Just a few words—"I failed. I've failed them—failed _Him_. I couldn't do it—couldn't save the story from her."

"No, my son." Ramandu replied calmly, shaking his white head. "Nor can any of us. Did you not learn from your adventure in the Lone Islands about _helplessness_? About how futile it is to try to accomplish anything in our own strength? When you place all your trust in yourself, the scales are tipped so easily—and all your well-intended plans will go awry."

"Oh." Connor drew in a ragged breath and wished he wasn't such an idiot. "_Oh_."

After all, the first thing they taught—the first thing _Jack_ taught—was that nobody could save the day on his own. Not Peter, not Edmund, not Caspian, not Tirian. Never was it one's own strength that saved Narnia, in the end. It was only _His_ strength that could do that. And every time they tried to depend on themselves, (he liked the way the _Prince Caspian_ movie addressed this, even though it was utterly hopeless in every other way) they were doomed to failure.

He closed his eyes and breathed an apology to the Only One who was strong enough to change things. _Lion's mane, I'm sorry. That's why it's all been wrong. I should've known…_

_Fear not_, the Lion answered him quietly (he jumped and nearly cried out for joy). _But go now and trust me only_.

The old star reached down and took the STARDD from where it had fallen. He closed his eyes and murmured something under his breath. A glow surrounded the device, and then Ramandu handed it back to Connor, who was still breathing hard and looking quite crestfallen and hopeless.

"It will not last long, but it will take you to the moment in which you are most needed—to a time when the story can still be salvaged."

Connor looked at the broken device in his hand and swallowed hard. "I…I don't know what to say."

Ramandu gave him a long, long look before finally replying, "Thank the Lion, my son, and forget not his faithfulness. Now go."

He took off at a dead sprint, aching muscles forgotten, mind filled with one purpose. In minutes he was at the beach, saw Donovan glance up and give him a curious and slightly reproving look as she started to say, "What took you so—"

And then he had grabbed her arm and said, "Hang on to Susan!" and, ignoring her startled yelp and Susan's painful inquiry, Connor gritted his teeth and swallowed his anxiety.

It was time to rewrite this story once and for all.

He pressed the button and plunged into suffocating blackness.

* * *

**_To be continued..._**


	11. In Which Everyone's Dreams Come True

**A/N:** Have another chapter! Also, I didn't know it, but this story was nominated on the Lion's Call (a fantastic website!) for a 2013 Lion Award for fan-fiction in four different categories. I'm rather proud that it got voted into "Funniest Fic" and "Most (Intentionally) Outrageous Mary Sue/Gary Stu," as well as "Best Original Character." I'm so proud of our story, Donovan! Thanks so much to whoever nominated or voted for this story!

Now. On to business. Who guessed where they would find themselves correctly? Pretty sure one of my lovely fantastic reviewers was close, if not right on.

Enjoy!

* * *

_Chapter 10: In Which Everyone's Dreams Come True_

Well actually, the blackness only lasted for about ten seconds, and then there was a sputtering and a crackling noise and Donovan's sight sort of exploded as bright sunlight bombarded her. She squeaked and put her hands over her eyes (letting go of Susan's arm) and waited until the tears stopped coming before she looked up and around.

There was an exclamation of surprise and then something almost tackled her. When Donovan opened her eyes she saw that it was Lucy, fair-haired and smiling like it was Christmas.

"You're alive!" she exclaimed. "Oh, Edmund! Eustace! Caspian! They've come back!"

She pulled back, still smiling, and then caught sight of Susan, who was on her knees on the deck (apparently they were back aboard the _Dawn Treader_), looking decidedly sick and even more confused than ever. Lucy's face went through a whole myriad of emotions before settling on bewilderedly happy. She wrapped herself around Susan and said, "You're here! You're back! And it's _you_!"

Susan looked confused. "Lucy? Why wouldn't it be—"

"Oh, Donovan!" Lucy interrupted, turning back to the Canon Keeper, suddenly almost in tears. "You wouldn't believe it—there was lightening, and then you and Connor were gone and only _she_ was left (and I know it isn't really Susan—everything's _wrong_ about her) and the _other one_ was here too, and it's been _ghastly_. The boys aren't themselves anymore, and I've hardly known what to do. If it hadn't been for Reepicheep and Eustace…"

"The other one?" Donovan replied, frowning. She turned to Connor, her mind suddenly very full with questions (such as, "How did you get the STARDD working again?" and "What island were we on?" and "Why did you look like you'd seen a ghost?") only to freeze at the look of horror that was now plastered across his face.

He was staring behind her, at someone or something. She whirled and saw that it was a girl, about her own height, with long golden hair (that curled attractively around her temples and shoulders) and eyes like two amethyst jewels.

"You," Connor breathed, his face as grim as Donovan had ever seen it. "You're the Mary Sue."

Batting her eyelashes once or twice, the girl gave a dazzling smile and replied, "Thought you'd 'preciate the originality, Connie."

If the situation hadn't felt so tense, Donovan would've burst out laughing at the horrified look and blush that spread across Connor's face. _Connie_?

"You know this Sue, Conn?" she asked, trying not to mentally make it "Connie" (and failing miserably).

"Yeah," he said. "We go way back. I should've known. You screwed with the STARDDs in that other fic too—the Edmund/Jill it's taken me so long to recover from. But why—"

"Why enter the story myself?" The Mary Sue gave a little laugh and dimpled. "Oh, rlly, Connie. You didn't think it was going to liek, stay Jillmund forever, did you? And didn't that Jill seem…I don't know. A little too…pretty for the usual Jillmund story? Maybe even like someone had…I dunno…replaced Jill?"

Donovan was concerned by the fact that Connor flinched every time she said "Jillmund." Well. She was flinching too. What an awful term—even for such an abomination.

"You sneaky little—" Connor bit his tongue and simply glared for fear he should misspeak (goodness knows Canon Keepers know how to hold their tongues). "And Susan? This whole lackadaisical affair?"

The girl glared. "It was meant to be a normal Suspian story until you liek, forced me to come join in and—ahem—self-insert myself as an OC who Edmund falls for. Not that we minded, did we Eddy?"

Connor and Donovan turned as one to see Edmund and Caspian standing behind them, both looking rather grim (if a little blank and darker-haired than usual). Something was definitely wrong. When they turned to look back at the Sue, movie-Susan was standing beside her, looking quite horribly triumphant.

There were a lot of things about this situation Donovan didn't understand. She cleared her throat and said, "Erm…you _do_ know that we have all the basic Canon Keeper tools and weapons and that we will not hesitate to stun you and your movie-Susan and take you back to our world if you don't cooperate?"

"Oh," said the Sue, feigning fear. "_Don't_ shoot me with your water-logged stun gun. Or spray me with your diluted de-OOC-ifying spray." A slightly evil smirk flashed across her face (a _smirk_!—what kind of story was this?). "You're in a pretty pickle, my dears. Oh, Connie, and I'd have thought you'd have learned from last time."

Connor turned to Caspian and Edmund, gritting his teeth. "Your majesties, listen to me. Whatever she's told you—whatever's happened, it's not true and it's wrong. Please tell me you haven't already—"

"Are you calling my beloved _a liar_?" Edmund roared, ripping his sword from his sheath. (Donovan knew right then that it was not going to go well.)

"They're trying to take me back," movie-Susan moaned, drawing Caspian's blank gaze. "My love—you cannot let them take me back!"

There was a slight noise as the previously unnoticed book-Susan stood slowly, leaning heavily on Lucy.

"Ridiculous," she said, in a cold, quiet voice. "Utterly ridiculous. All of you. And as for you—Edmund, Caspian, can't you see she isn't me?"

"Lucy," said Edmund quietly. "Get away from them—come here now."

"No," Lucy snapped. Her eyes were round and frightened. "They're right—the other Susan is all wrong and that other girl is a witch—or something worse."

"Lucy!" Caspian and Edmund and movie-Susan snapped. Lucy buried her face in her real sister's skirt.

"Gentlemen." Connor held up his hands and tried to sound rational. "I think we're being a bit too hasty about all this. How about we all put our swords down and start discussing this like grown-ups and not like angsty teenagers in love."

"I have a better idea," said Caspian coldly, drawing his own sword. "How about you and your friend and that girl pretending to be my love step away from Lucy, follow us without any trouble, and _shut up _about Queen Susan and Princess Mariana Susanna."

"Caspian!" Connor exclaimed, shaking his head. "This is not you! Look at me—remember the Lone Islands? What we talked about, about _trusting Aslan_? Well—"

To everyone's surprise (except perhaps the Mary Sue's), Caspian lunged forward and shoved Connor against the wooden wall that was the side of the cabin, bashing his head into the wood. Donovan cried out and leapt after him, catching him as he stumbled backwards. There was blood, and that was enough.

"Fine," Donovan exclaimed, glaring first at Caspian and then at the smirking Sue. "We'll go quietly. But I'm warning you—and I don't care how clichéd this sounds—you're making a big mistake."

* * *

They were escorted quickly, at sword-point, to Drinian's cabin (the poor captain hardly blinked upon seeing them captive—apparently the Sue had bewitched the whole crew) where they were locked in and left in silence in the dim light. Book-Susan (we shall hence-forth refer to her as simply Susan, and let the imposter be always named as such) was loath to let Lucy be torn away from her, and looked as though she might cry for a few moments after the door had been shut, but after a while she simply undid her knot of hair and began to work through it with her fingers, looking at the windows of the cabin very pensively.

Donovan found an emergency flashlight in her belt (finding it strangely ironic that this utterly useless piece of equipment should be waterproof instead of the other, more important devices) and shined it around.

Upon closer inspection, Connor's head had not been bashed too badly. He had a cut on the right part of his forehead which was annoying, because at first the blood dripped into his eye, and besides, that part of the head is very tender and it hurt a great deal. But after allowing Donovan to exclaim over it for a minute or so, he recovered sufficiently to look sulky and snarl something nasty about that _rotten_ Sue and how he was going to have revenge. At that point, Donovan decided he was likely alright, but she still kept him from leaping up and pacing about the room and insisted he stay sitting at least until the bleeding stopped. So, still scowling, he yanked out the STARDD and began fiddling with the corroded wires in the light of the very small flashlight, muttering to himself.

And Donovan did his pacing for him. "Do you have any idea where we are?" she asked (mostly herself—neither of the others were really listening). "I mean, after the Sea Serpent? After Dragon Island? Earlier? After?"

As expected, nobody answered. And then there was a scratching sound from the floor, and Susan squeaked a little in surprise.

It wasn't coming from the floor. It was coming from a grate that apparently led down into the hold. Donovan crawled over and pulled it up, and who should crawl into the room but Reepicheep!

"My lady," the Mouse said, sweeping a very graceful bow and then following it with a sneeze. Apparently wherever he'd come from was rather dusty.

"Reep!" Donovan exclaimed. "Thank the Lion. What in the world is happening on this ship?"

"Achoo!" Another sneeze came from below, in the hold. "Reep, did you make it alright?!"

"Is that…Eustace?" Donovan asked, leaning over to look in. The Pevensies' cousin blinked up at her and then smiled a little.

"I can't stay—they'll be looking for me, but I wanted to be sure and…apologize. For calling you Nazis."

Stifling a snicker, Donovan nodded. "Thanks. You've changed, Scrubb."

He nodded. "Sorry—got to go now."

Donovan turned back to Reepicheep.

The Talking Mouse wrinkled his nose and said, "It may be against my honor to speak ill of a lady, but that…that girl is no friend of Narnia! Never have I been so bewildered, so furious…and the way they treat Queen Lucy!"

"Reepicheep," Donovan said quickly, glancing at the door and hoping nobody could hear the enraged squeaking. "We're here to help—at least, we hope so. What island or…or thing happened last. Where are you on the quest?"

"We have just set sail from the Isle of a strange and foolish people," the Mouse replied, twitching his whiskers. "I have not time to tell you the whole story now, but they call themselves—"

"Dufflepuds, yes?" Donovan turned to Connor and said, "'ey—we're on to Dark Island next."

"Oh, _lovely_," came the sarcastic reply. "As if this wasn't nightmare enough!"

"Dark Island?" Reepicheep sneezed again and added, "But how can you already know of it? It did not appear on the horizon until they had already discovered you and imprisoned you here in the captain's cabin."

"Great," Donovan moaned. "It's already here, practically. How close are we, Reep?"

"An hour?" the mouse replied. "Perhaps less? It took me longer than expected to find the crawlway to this room. Lady Donovan—I swore allegiance to follow my king, but something is not right here. Something is wrong—and my intuition tells me you know how to fix it."

"That's the hope, Reepicheep," the Canon Keeper replied. She turned to Connor. "Keep fiddling, MacGyver. I think I might just have a plan."

* * *

They felt rather than saw the darkness come over the ship. It was as though every hint of hope or joy or excitement had been snuffed out like a candle. The dim light was next to go—Connor closed his hands around the STARDD and gripped it tightly, hoping all his tweaking hadn't been in vain. The miniscule flashlight looked odd, and extraordinarily bright in the pitch blackness around them.

They would only get one shot at this. Both Canon Keepers had been in grim agreement on that point. As soon as the nightmares began to strike on deck, chaos would ensue. They would rush out and grab hold of movie-Susan and the Mary Sue and (with the Real Susan with them) would be transported back home with the last energy the STARDD could muster.

That is, if everything went as planned. There was currently not a solidified backup plan, but in the back of his mind, Connor was prepared to sacrifice himself if it meant getting Donovan back safely. Which was, of course, very noble of him, even more so because it was something Donovan would likely not at all appreciate.

They huddled together in the darkness, the four of them (Connor, Donovan, Susan, and Reepicheep). Minutes passed. Donovan had always rather disliked the dark, but it grew more oppressive as soon as the screams began.

Almost as soon as they heard the first, Donovan was on her feet, dragging Connor and Susan up with her.

"Come on!" she hissed. "It's now or never—while they're surprised."

Gritting his teeth and angling the flashlight forward, Connor grabbed the door handle and pushed against it as hard as he could. Astonishingly, it opened easily enough—the man Pittencream who'd been set to guard them was staring somewhere to the starboard of the ship with a pale, horrified look on his face.

They immediately set out to find the false Susan and the Sue. Donovan remembered from the book that Edmund and Caspian had been together on the deck (with Lucy up in the fighting top), and it seemed likely that the two imposters were with them. Together. That would be convenient.

She was climbing the ladder when she felt Connor freeze behind her. She turned to look at him and saw that he was staring with horror toward the starboard side, just as Pittencream had.

"Conn," she hissed. "Come on—it isn't real."

In the light of the flashlight, his face looked very, very pale and stricken—heartbroken, really. She wondered if this was a common nightmare, if he'd had it again and again, or if it was a new horror invented by the darkness just for him. What could it be to make him look like that?

"Mum?" he whispered in a very queer voice.

Donovan did not include that in the report.

She grabbed his shoulder, jerked him toward the ladder, and kept climbing. Susan was just behind her, seemingly unaffected by the ruckus around them. At the top of the ladder, Donovan expected to see false-Susan and the Mary Sue.

Instead, she saw a ghostly green figure, its six arms outstretched, its beak opened in croaking roar. The smell hit her like a wave of water, and she almost fell off the ladder, choking and gasping in disgust. The horror froze her blood, and for a moment, she faltered, ten years of nightmares all becoming alive in her memory once more. She was a child again, horrified at this pagan thing, this atrocity of a false god, and even more afraid that it was not just a thing in a story.

And then she felt Connor's hand squeeze her ankle from below, and felt a warm burst of courage, that quality which is prerequisite for becoming a Canon Keeper. With a growl of impatience with herself (of course she _would_ see Tash), Donovan flung herself up onto the deck and walked right past the rasping monster. Holding her nose, of course, for she couldn't imagine the stench away.

She had taken the flashlight from Connor, and now she shined it around the deck. It only took a moment to find the two imposters. They stood by their respective beloveds and cringed away from the light, vague looks of terror in their eyes.

Donovan was struck by a thought.

"Connor," she whispered, fascinated, "I think we're their worst nightmare."

* * *

**_To be continued in one last installment, lovingly entitled, "In Which Mary Sue Wins and The Canon is Destroyed Forever"  
_**

**_...just kidding._**


	12. In Which the Mary Sue Almost Wins

_Chapter 11: In Which the Mary Sue Almost Wins_

She heard him take a breath as though he was about to quip something clever back, or laugh aloud, or cry out in fear, but a sudden piercing screech drowned out any sound he might have emitted. A gust of wind stirred the blackness, and Donovan froze.

"S-sea-serpent," Connor stammered. "It's the wrong time, but that's it—I know it is. Look!"

He grabbed her wrist and shone the light over the oily black water until it caught on the large, rough humps that shifted among the waves.

Donovan muttered a not-very-nice word. "We have to do it now—quick! You grab Susan, and I'll get the Sue."

She closed her hand around the STARDD and, breathing a prayer to the Lion, dove forward at the same time as Connor. Before her hands closed on the Sue's arm, a scaly object with the force of a freight train knocked off her feet. Donovan gasped and slammed into the railing of the deck. Lifting her head (she could feel the pieces of her shattered ribs protesting), she saw a dark vermilion face with dull red eyes staring into her soul.

"Donovan!" Connor screamed. The STARDD had slipped from her hands and was on the edge—was sliding toward the water. Cursing, he dove forward and grabbed it, still holding on to false-Susan.

A rancid smell, like that of rotting fish, would have made Donovan gag had she not been frozen stiff, staring at the sharp, jagged teeth, the grimy scales, the malevolent glare of the Serpent. It gave a sniff and drew back half an inch, apparently contemplating whether or not she was worth eating.

Fake. Fake. It had to be fake. But that smell was so real, and the gleam of those red eyes…it opened its mouth and let out a screech that left Donovan reeling, hands on her ears. She thought then that she was going to die.

"Don!" Connor shouted from the railing, still struggling with false-Susan (just then she got one hand free and left a blaze of claw-marks across his cheek). "NO!"

Suddenly, from out of the darkness came a slender second-best sword with a young boy attached at the hilt. Hurtling forward with a howl, Eustace struck at the beast's scaly neck again and again. Donovan felt a furry warmth beside her and knew that Reep was there too, ready to do the foolish thing and attack the Sea Serpent head-on if it meant protecting a lady in distress.

She rolled to her knees, biting back a groan as she felt a stabbing pain that indicated she'd broken a rib (or maybe two). Her arm was likely broken as well, or at least badly bruised from the Serpent's attack. Drawing a ragged breath, Donovan pressed her arm against her ribs and stood shakily.

"YOU!" shouted the Mary Sue, looking less afraid and a little more in control (she was wearing a smirk). "I'm not afraid of you anymore. This is my story—my Sea Serpent. I can make it do, liek, whatever I want. Like…this!"

A somewhat horrible expression passed across the beautiful girl's face, and the Serpent shrieked and drew back from Eustace's blows. With a howl, it dove for…

…Connor, stooping by the railing, clenching the false Susan with one hand and the STARDD in the other. Its sharp teeth flashed in the light of the tiny flashlight and there was a cry of pain.

"CONNOR!" Donovan screamed. She staggered toward the railing, but it was too late—the jaws closed with a snap and suddenly there was a flash of light.

She could have fainted with relief. Connor and the false-Susan were gone.

* * *

Everyone paused, blinking in surprise (and at the sudden light). Even the Sea Serpent was taken aback, and it cringed backward, shaking its head from the glare the STARDD had made, momentarily not a problem. Donovan turned her attention to the Mary Sue, whose face was the very definition of surprise.

"I…I thought…" a frown appeared on her face as fast as you could say Jack Robinson. "Your thingy…arghghgh, this can't be happening!"

"Fraid it is," said Donovan, confidence boosted by the knowledge that a sword-bearing Mouse was standing at her knee. "Your little plan is backfiring, Sue. That's what happens when you mess with the Canon without a permit!"

The Mary Sue rolled her eyes. "Yeah. Well. Too bad. But now that your boyfriend is gone with that piece of junk and my Suspian dreams, I guess it's just you and me. Oh," she added, smirking again. "And the Sea Serpent. And Eddy."

_Eddy_. Donovan cringed and let out a sigh. She was glad that Connor was safe (wouldn't have it any other way) but now she was in rather a pickle. Soon enough the Serpent would get over its sudden exposure to the light of the STARDD and then what would happen?

"Donovan." Eustace was beside her, grabbing her arm and helping her stand up straight. "It's gone—I don't know where, but oh _Jove_, what _was_ that?"

"Donovan!" came Lucy's voice from behind. Don turned and saw that Lucy and Susan—the real Susan—were standing together beside a Caspian who was suddenly much blonder than the Sue's Caspian had been (and, again, bewildered looking). Eustace ran to them, babbling something about the other Susan and how she'd just _vanished_.

"It's no good," Donovan said, turning back to the Sue. "We're going to win. Connor will be back—you'll be taken down a notch or two and have your fanfiction account deleted. So we can either do this part the easy way or the hard way."

The Sue's face flushed, but her smirk only faltered for a second. "So you say. But who knows if your little boyfriend is even coming back? And if he does," she smiled slowly, "who knows if he'll make it back in time?"

While Donovan was still trying to process this (and thinking, "Oh, _Jove_, the Serpent is coming back,") she felt the sharp edge of a sword brush gently against the side of her neck. Her blood turned cold.

"You see," said the Mary Sue quietly, "you can take away my Susan, my dark-haired Caspian, even my Sea Serpent (for however brief a time). But one thing you can't take away from me is my Eddy."

Donovan suddenly became very, very still, trying hard not to flinch away from the cold steel that silently caressed her skin. One move, and it would slice.

"Edmund," she said quietly. "Oi. This isn't you. C'mon, your highness. Put the sword down."

There was no sound from Edmund. Lucy, however, let out a little cry and made a sound that was likely her trying to dash forward and being held back by Eustace or Susan or someone who realized that swords were sharp and Edmund was not himself.

"So," the Mary Sue gloated, twisting a lock of her shining hair around her finger and putting a hand on her hip. "Easy way or hard way?"

* * *

Donovan honestly thought she was done for. She'd almost died before—multiple times, in fact—and honestly, the way her ribs and arm were aching, and her head was spinning, dying probably wouldn't make her current situation hurt that much more. She wasn't afraid of death. But she had a family back home and besides, Connor would blame himself, so she earnestly hoped that something would happen before the Sue decided to order her execution.

Something did.

A light, as bright as a spotlight, shone down from the blackness above. And Donovan's heart gave a great leap as she suddenly remembered—_the_ _Albatross_!

Everyone's eyes turned upward, even Edmund's, and the sword wavered for a moment.

It was enough. Donovan spun away and found, to her everlasting gratitude, that Caspian was right there, prepared to step between her and Edmund the moment she was far enough away. The Mary Sue gave a little shriek of anger and shouted, "KILL HER, EDDY, KILL HER!"

A sword fight ensued. Meanwhile, the Captain had come out of the stupor and began ordering the men to turn the ship around and "_Follow that bird_!" Edmund's eyes were blank, but occasionally hesitation flashed in them. Donovan could see that Caspian was trying as best he could not to hurt the bewitched Pevensie, but was having trouble because Edmund was, in fact, a good fighter, even while bewitched.

Donovan looked up at the Albatross flying before them and whispered, "Thank you, Aslan. But oh, _help_."

They burst into the sunlight, and warmth flooded the ship. Donovan felt a moment's relief from the pain in her ribs and arm as a deep, strong voice whispered, "Courage, Dear One."

Everyone blinked, a little stunned by the sudden light. An instant later, Susan was beside her brother, batting his sword away and shaking him very hard. Edmund changed before Donovan's eyes—his hair lightened, a few freckles disappeared, and he grew a few inches shorter.

"Su?" he asked, voice hoarse. The sword trembled in his hand. "What's going on?"

"Eddy?" the Mary Sue whimpered. She turned to glare at Susan and said, "You. You did this."

"Yes," Susan replied coldly, drawing herself up and glaring daggers. "I did. And it's about time somebody did something, even if everything you've done to ruin these Canon Keepers' worthy efforts has worked. Were it in my power, I would exile you to a place where you can do no more harm to my country."

"I'm for that," said Caspian, sword yet unsheathed.

"Yeah," Edmund put in, glowering at the Sue (still uncertain as to what exactly had happened, but knowing that something was very wrong).

Now that the Dark Island had passed and the spell on Edmund and the ship's crew had broken, it seemed the Mary Sue's power had been somewhat diminished (if not entirely destroyed). She, at least, believed it to be so. There was a look of defeat that clouded her once-victorious eyes.

"I don't see why you're so angry," the Sue said, pouting as she looked about at the angry faces. "It's just a story."

"It is not 'just a story'," said Susan angrily, eyes flashing, chin lifted with all the dignity and regality of the Narnian Queen she had once been (and, deep down inside, still was). "Do you still not understand what you've done? You have taken a noble story—an innocent adventure, void of unnecessary amounts of unnatural romance and sap—our _lives_—and twisted it into something hardly recognizable. You have made ashes of our dignity, of the meaningfulness of this story, of our entire world. How _dare_ you?"

"Do something," Edmund said, brandishing his sword again (eyes narrowed, suspicious). "Fix the story."

"I can't fix it," the Mary Sue breathed, turquoise eyes filling with glassy tears (that actually looked somewhat sincere because _Eddy why are you looking at me like that?_). "I can't."

"But we can," said a much-beloved voice from behind them. Donovan turned and saw a still shimmering Connor stepping towards her, his expression going from victorious to very anxious indeed. His face (scratched, either by the Sea Serpent's teeth or the false-Susan's fingernails) was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. "Lion's mane, Don, you alright?"

Donovan croaked something that might have been a yes and promptly fell over. Connor was at her side in an instant, pressing a hand to her wrist to feel her pulse ("_Jove_, I'm in for it!") and wrapping an arm around her to help her stand. He was apologizing profusely, for the broken ribs, for leaving her, for everything that had gone wrong on the whole adventure, when she pressed her hand over his mouth and said, "Shut up, you domnoddy."

So he did. But he didn't take his arm away from around her shoulders, and she was glad for the support.

"You," he said to the Mary Sue (who looked positively crushed). "We're going back, and you're not going to make a fuss about it or else. I don't want to have to stun you with my new, un-waterlogged stun gun…but actually I do, so don't make me. Queen Susan," he continued, (blushing?), turning to the queen, "It's time to get you back to your own time."

"Certainly," Susan said, grabbing hold of the Mary Sue's arm and smiling brightly.

There was time, yet, for a few farewells. Susan embraced her siblings and said she'd see them soon, and to have a good trip, and my, wasn't Eustace turning into quite a young man.

Donovan, a bit groggy, said her thanks to Reepicheep and Eustace, Lucy and Caspian, and graciously received a vague apology from Edmund.

Connor shook Caspian's hand and said thanks and it was an honor and a pleasure. Caspian grinned and gripped his hand firmly.

"My friend—I hardly know how to thank you. Both of you. I shall never forget this."

"Actually," said Connor a little sheepishly, "I'm afraid you will. But thanks, your highness. Do us a favor and get married to that blond lass at the end of the world. She's been waiting for you for a long time."

The air filled with the somewhat sweet smell of mind-wiping spray, and a moment later, there was nothing left of the four strangers but a shimmer of light.

* * *

**_Okay, just kidding, one more chapter..._**


	13. Epilogue

A/N: Thanks everyone for sticking with this story during the incredibly long and unannounced hiatus. You have encouraged me beyond belief. Without your spurring on, Connor and Donovan might have been stuck in _Voyage_ forever (not that they really would have minded...).

As we began with a prologue, I thought we'd be nice and circular and end with an epilogue. This may actually be my favorite. I hope you made it this far. Thanks so much for reading! I hope you've enjoyed the story.

Also, thanks to everyone who voted for this story in **_The Lion's Call _(a fantastic Narnia fansite) Lion Awards**. Voyage of the Canon Keepers won the** Jackdaw Award for Funniest Fic**! Thanks, TLC and whoever nominated this thing for the awards. Definitely made my week. :)

And now...

Enjoy.

* * *

_Epilogue_

"And there you have it, chief," the young man said, lacing and unlacing his fingers together—a nervous habit he usually hid by constantly having something else in his hands. "The whole story."

The chief leaned back in his chair and shook his head. "Quite a story, Connor. But despite the reports about your…apparently suspect reliability, I believe every word."

"Thank you, sir," the Keeper replied. "Much obliged, I'm sure. I'm not sure this is the right time, but I was going to request permission to have a few days off before the next assignment."

Eyeing him thoughtfully, the chief nodded. "Yes, of course. You could do with a little leave-time. But as soon as you've checked up on Donovan and gotten those claw-marks on your pretty face seen to, I want you to report back to the lab to help the techs with those improvements you suggested. For the STARDDs."

Connor grinned. "Happy to." He stood to go, but the chief, shuffling through a few papers on his desk, added, "By the way, Agent Hooper himself sends his regards and recommended you for a commendation. Bravery in the face of extreme peril."

The sandy eyebrows lifted. The chief noticed (as the captain and watcher and everyone had noticed over the past day or so) that a little of the mischief had gone out of his eyes. "Only if Don gets one too, sir. After all, she's the one who's in the hospital."

"Yes," admitted the chief, "but you're the one who will be writing the report."

Ignoring the moan of displeasure, he added, "Dismissed, Keeper. Oh, and I feel I should warn you—all this newfound attention may cause a little jealousy from the others. I'd watch out for the old tobasco-sauce-in-the-coffee if I were you."

Running a hand through his hair, Connor hid a sudden mischievous smile (perhaps it hadn't all disappeared after all), but gave no reply as he headed toward the door. He was most of the way down the hall before he heard the surprised roar from the office behind him (and took off at a run, just for good measure).

Half an hour later he was at the recovery ward in the hospital, holding a wad full of wildflowers and wrinkling his nose at the hospital smell. When he peered in her open door, he saw that she was looking out the window. Her face was a little less pale than it had been yesterday.

"Well," he said, grinning as she whipped her head around to look at him, "you look strong enough to pull the ears off a gundark."

"Connor!" Donovan exclaimed, a smile rippling across her face. And then, gesturing to the flowers, "Are those for me?"

"Yeah," he shot back. "Smuggled 'em in. They're probably full of allergens and stuff. How's tricks?"

"I've been better. But the worst part is the quiet." She played with the bedcover absently. "I mean, after all we've been through over the last week or so…"

"Tell me about it," he replied with a sigh. "And it'll take even longer for everything to heal up. Your ribs, my looks…"

Donovan grinned as she eyed the almost-healed finger-nail marks that still showed on her fellow Keeper's face. "I dunno…gives you a rakish look. At least you can breathe without hurting. I could have killed that Sue for summoning the serpent when she did."

"Well, not to fear. She's back where she belongs—in her fuscia colored room in Chicago. Without Wi-fi. You should have seen her at the arraignment. And movie-Susan, too! Although, the real Susan Pevensie was…a wonder."

"Easy there, Fanboy," Donovan quipped, grinning at the dreamy look on his face. "Still, I wish I could've been there." The ginger sighed and looked out the window again. "Well. I guess you'll be back to work soon enough."

Connor scratched the back of his neck and plopped down in one of the chairs beside her bed. "Not until I get the report written up. All by my lonesome, since you're holed up here. And so much happened during our adventure…I don't know how I'm going to get it all down."

He felt a gentle touch as she placed her hand on his, and looked up to see that her eyes were smiling.

"Together, Connor. We'll do it together. Just like everything else."

**END REPORT**

* * *

Final addendums to **NCK Case 2456317**:

(**NCK Record [Quote: Donovan, Cordelia]:** "Connor, I did not either say that last bit and I certainly didn't say it like that! You're such a sap! _Why_ the chief would commission the _fanfiction writer_ between us to write the report is a mystery to me. What will people think? _Oh_! I want to go on record to OBJECT to my representation in the epilogue of the report. ON RECORD. DO YOU HEAR ME?" **[End Quote]**)

**(NCK Record [Quote: Connor, Ioan]:** "All representations of characters and events in this story are [speaker hesitates] completely and utterly accurate according to the author of the report. My observations were my guide. So there, _Cordelia_." **[End Quote])**

Addendum after review:

(**NCK Record [Quote: Donovan, Cordelia]:** "Whatever you say, _Connie_." **[End Quote])**

_Fin_.


End file.
